The "**** it I'm going deep offense" sounds all well and good
This article sounds like it was written by JiF. Grossman did go to Florida, after all. Hmmmm.http://kissingsuzyko...-downfield.htmlF*** It, I'm Throwing it Downfield
Big Daddy Drew
Is that Berrian? I think he’s triple-covered. You know what? **** it. I’m throwing it downfield.
Yeah, I see Jones open on the flank. But **** that. Dumpoff passes are for faggots. I’m ****ing Sexy Rexy Grossman. I can get that ball in there. And, even if I can’t, I bet I’ll be able to pull it off the next go round. I like throwing the ball long. It makes my dick hard.
What’s that? I should throw a quick slant? **** that. That’s gay. Button hook? Gay. Flare out? Gay. Screen pass? Kevin Spacey gay. This is ****ing football. You can’t just expect wins to come to you. You can’t massage that sh*t. You gotta grab that game by the throat and rape the ever-loving sh*t out of it. You think a 5-yard out is gonna win you a game? You’re a pussy. This ain’t John Shoop running this offense. Sexy Rexy’s got the arm. The dragon. You gotta unleash the dragon.
Okay, I’m throwing it. Nice. Look how far it went. I look good. I bet I made that Pats cheerleader wet her panties with that throw. She ****ing wants me. I bet she likes it over a stair railing. I can hit that with 100% accuracy, my dear. Mmmmmm. I am delicious.
Oh sh*t. Looks like Samuel caught it. Again. Oh well. It still felt ****ing great to throw that sh*t. Tell me that wasn’t one of the prettiest passes you ever saw. You know what? Not only am I gonna throw it long the next time we hit the field. I’m gonna throw it even longer
. Harder. You see that kid in wheelchair sitting in the end zone bleachers? I’m gonna nail him right between the ****ing eyes with a Sexy Rexy fastball. Why? Because I can.
This is Rex Grossman we’re talking about here. We’re talking 210 lbs. of twisted steel and sex appeal. I’m not just a gunslinger. I’m a cumslinger. Throwing that ball long tells all the Rexettes that I am ****ing out there. On the edge. Where I gotta be. The ladies love the danger. The unpredictability. Oh, maybe I’ll tease them with a pretty touch pass every now and again. But then I’m gonna go right back to pumping that ball out for all it’s worth. It tells them I throw like I ****. That’s how we do things in the sexy business.
Tell me you’re not turned on right now. I am.
Edited by Jetsfan80, 07 December 2012 - 01:31 PM.