Lizard King Posted July 2, 2014 Share Posted July 2, 2014 Share em... I'll start Just bought a home where a seller jerked us off for 4 weeks over $1,000 (half) radon credit and finally agreed on 6am Monday, three days before an expedited closing that she asked for.... Then has movers in the place on closing day so we couldn't get a decent walk through... Nicks walls up and didn't cover cost/fix....And to top it off, steals garage door opener, all toilet paper, and keeps a set of keys. Best part, she moved across town. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
#27TheDominator Posted July 2, 2014 Share Posted July 2, 2014 Share em... I'll start Just bought a home where a seller jerked us off for 4 weeks over $1,000 (half) radon credit and finally agreed on 6am Monday, three days before an expedited closing that she asked for.... Then has movers in the place on closing day so we couldn't get a decent walk through... Nicks walls up and didn't cover cost/fix....And to top it off, steals garage door opener, all toilet paper, and keeps a set of keys. Best part, she moved across town. That is not a horror story. That is pretty normal. Horror story is when the title examiner asks the seller's SSN and it turns out there is a seven figure tax lien. When the seller walks out on the ledge, that is a horror story. Closing started at 10 a.m. and finished at 7:45 p.m. IRS actually sent somebody over to pick up the check. Good times. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Integrity28 Posted July 2, 2014 Share Posted July 2, 2014 Share em... I'll start Just bought a home where a seller jerked us off for 4 weeks over $1,000 (half) radon credit and finally agreed on 6am Monday, three days before an expedited closing that she asked for.... Then has movers in the place on closing day so we couldn't get a decent walk through... Nicks walls up and didn't cover cost/fix....And to top it off, steals garage door opener, all toilet paper, and keeps a set of keys. Best part, she moved across town. At this point, I think you could justify curbing her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lizard King Posted July 2, 2014 Author Share Posted July 2, 2014 That is not a horror story. That is pretty normal. Horror story is when the title examiner asks the seller's SSN and it turns out there is a seven figure tax lien. When the seller walks out on the ledge, that is a horror story. Closing started at 10 a.m. and finished at 7:45 p.m. IRS actually sent somebody over to pick up the check. Good times. OH right! I forgot to mention, my lender's Fed Wire went down at noon on closing. We signed everything and had to wait around twiddling our thumbs, If there was ever karma, this was probably it, as the seller couldn't close on her $1,000,000 home until my wire hit escrow, around 6pm that day. But that title check sounds brutal. Just brutal. I would've given up. The IRS personally picking up a check....that's historic. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thor99 Posted July 2, 2014 Share Posted July 2, 2014 I have a VA loan, and they use only one appraiser in this area. Of course, he goes on a six week vacation. Causing me to have to extend my rate twice and postpone closing twice. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lizard King Posted July 2, 2014 Author Share Posted July 2, 2014 I have a VA loan, and they use only one appraiser in this area. Of course, he goes on a six week vacation. Causing me to have to extend my rate twice and postpone closing twice. 6 Weeks?! WTF, is he French? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
#27TheDominator Posted July 2, 2014 Share Posted July 2, 2014 OH right! I forgot to mention, my lender's Fed Wire went down at noon on closing. We signed everything and had to wait around twiddling our thumbs, If there was ever karma, this was probably it, as the seller couldn't close on her $1,000,000 home until my wire hit escrow, around 6pm that day. But that title check sounds brutal. Just brutal. I would've given up. The IRS personally picking up a check....that's historic. The good news is that i was just picking up a check. They let us leave and come back in the afternoon. I was still there for several hours and witnessed death threats and suicide attempts, but not as many as some of those poor bastards. The lady had a real common name and kept saying "that's not me" "that's not me" until they checked the social. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lizard King Posted July 2, 2014 Author Share Posted July 2, 2014 The good news is that i was just picking up a check. They let us leave and come back in the afternoon. I was still there for several hours and witnessed death threats and suicide attempts, but not as many as some of those poor bastards. The lady had a real common name and kept saying "that's not me" "that's not me" until they checked the social. Ah so you are the tax man? What's it like having everyone hate you? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lizard King Posted July 2, 2014 Author Share Posted July 2, 2014 At this point, I think you could justify curbing her. Maybe. Such a phony....and a total JAP Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
#27TheDominator Posted July 2, 2014 Share Posted July 2, 2014 Ah so you are the tax man? What's it like having everyone hate you? Everyone hates me, but I'm not the tax man. He didn't have to stay very long. The rest of us were there for hours waiting for him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Matt39 Posted July 2, 2014 Share Posted July 2, 2014 Where are you buying Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lizard King Posted July 2, 2014 Author Share Posted July 2, 2014 Everyone hates me, but I'm not the tax man. He didn't have to stay very long. The rest of us were there for hours waiting for him. That sounds terrible. If you are a real estate agent , my brother is starting to thikn about purchasing property in McLean. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
#27TheDominator Posted July 2, 2014 Share Posted July 2, 2014 That sounds terrible. If you are a real estate agent , my brother is starting to thikn about purchasing property in McLean. Worse. Attorney, but I don't deal with real estate much these days. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lizard King Posted July 2, 2014 Author Share Posted July 2, 2014 Worse. Attorney, but I don't deal with real estate much these days. My atty told me to just let it go with the above issues. I got the house. Not worth writing a letter over a couple dings in the paint and a garage door opener. If my dog sh*ts on her porch one day, c'est la vie. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
#27TheDominator Posted July 2, 2014 Share Posted July 2, 2014 My atty told me to just let it go with the above issues. I got the house. Not worth writing a letter over a couple dings in the paint and a garage door opener. If my dog sh*ts on her porch one day, c'est la vie. Sounds like good advice. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lizard King Posted July 2, 2014 Author Share Posted July 2, 2014 Sounds like good advice. I knocked it down about 10% off asking anyway. I win. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CTM Posted July 2, 2014 Share Posted July 2, 2014 Share em... I'll start Just bought a home where a seller jerked us off for 4 weeks over $1,000 (half) radon credit and finally agreed on 6am Monday, three days before an expedited closing that she asked for.... Then has movers in the place on closing day so we couldn't get a decent walk through... Nicks walls up and didn't cover cost/fix....And to top it off, steals garage door opener, all toilet paper, and keeps a set of keys. Best part, she moved across town. Lmao, who the **** would want thier toilet paper Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lizard King Posted July 2, 2014 Author Share Posted July 2, 2014 Lmao, who the **** would want thier toilet paper You strike me as someone who has rooms full of it from extreme couponing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CTM Posted July 2, 2014 Share Posted July 2, 2014 You strike me as someone who has rooms full of it from extreme couponing. I have rooms full of it in preparation for a Crusher pop over Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RutgersJetFan Posted July 2, 2014 Share Posted July 2, 2014 I'd keep the TP too. We're in a recession, dicks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lizard King Posted July 2, 2014 Author Share Posted July 2, 2014 I have rooms full of it in preparation for a Crusher pop over Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
#27TheDominator Posted July 2, 2014 Share Posted July 2, 2014 I'd keep the TP too. We're in a recession, dicks. Why don't they just steal it from work, like everybody else? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bob Posted July 3, 2014 Share Posted July 3, 2014 Lmao, who the **** would want thier toilet paper I was wondering the same thing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PFSIKH Posted July 3, 2014 Share Posted July 3, 2014 Lmao, who the **** would want thier toilet paper Ever use Aloe toilet paper? That $hit is the bomb. No horror stories here. Just lessons learned. If you buy a house that is around 10 years old, you are likely going to replace most appliances in the first 5-10 years. Plus, heating units. Check and check. Buy new (if possible). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lizard King Posted July 3, 2014 Author Share Posted July 3, 2014 Lmao, who the **** would want thier toilet paper I was wondering the same thing. IDK I guess it just seemed the icing on the cake after all the parsimonious sh*t this see you next tuesday had thrown at us. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SouthernJet Posted July 3, 2014 Share Posted July 3, 2014 Share em... I'll start Just bought a home where a seller jerked us off for 4 weeks over $1,000 (half) radon credit and finally agreed on 6am Monday, three days before an expedited closing that she asked for.... Then has movers in the place on closing day so we couldn't get a decent walk through... Nicks walls up and didn't cover cost/fix....And to top it off, steals garage door opener, all toilet paper, and keeps a set of keys. Best part, she moved across town. Hire a Shark, 'take no prisoners' Lawyer, ASAP Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Larz Posted July 4, 2014 Share Posted July 4, 2014 I do gas system inspections for new owners all the time. the inspectors miss obvious things all the time. the pressure regulators need to be updated every 12-15 years. if the tank is older than that, you probably need new ones. it's not a huge deal, but having it accounted for at closing helps. a system can have 1-5 regulators at $100 bucks each including parts and labor and an underground tank should be replaced or abandoned after 25 years. that is much more expensive. it bums me out to do these inspections and have to give the new owner the bad news that they already closed, and have an outdated system Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CTM Posted July 4, 2014 Share Posted July 4, 2014 I hate when the previous owners pick up their dog sh*t before i move in.. it's like hey, due to all the parsimonious sh*t you just put me through the least you can do is leave the fecal nuggets Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kleckineau Posted July 5, 2014 Share Posted July 5, 2014 When buying my 1st house I had to sue the seller to follow through on the sales contract. 2 weeks after we signed the sales contract, the buyers lawyer sent my lawyer a check, returning the 10% of the agreed sales price I had given at contract and said the seller has changed his mind and is not selling. As it turns out, the price we went to contract at was about 25-30% below market value and after signing a contract to sell to me he had gotten a few better offers. It took almost a year to enforce the contract but we got it done. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JetsFanInDenver Posted July 5, 2014 Share Posted July 5, 2014 delete....on second thoughts too much info. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bugg Posted July 6, 2014 Share Posted July 6, 2014 As an attorney who does real estate and taxes, 2 things: First, if you take money out of your pension ro 401K to buy a house, please know the rules.The bank or broker who holds the account can explain them; ask. Had a tax client who sold her old house and bought her dream house with a significant chunk of her 401k for the big ass upgrade and ASSUMED that that money was tax free. It was not her first home, and the "rollover" of capital gains no long applies(and hasn't for a while). I was not her attorney on the clsoing and did not advise her until she came to get her taxes done, simply review her tax paperwork. When I explained how much she owed to the feds for the 401K money even with a smll break on the penalty , she totally freaked the eff out. Second, please check with your mortgage rep how much will be available at closing and what the expected costs will be. If you take out, say, $200K on a mortgage, you are not getting the full amount to pay the seller, more likely $5K less. Small mortgage brokers are notorious for lowballing these costs because they make their money from a commission on your deal. They want you to close ASAP. But typically the smaller the bank or broker, the higher the costs. Of course they are going to be very accomodating to get you to close. A big bank is not going to be nearly as helpful, but they make money when they bundle your mortgage and thousands like it in the market as a investment. Typically their costs are going to be lower nut their customer service is gonna suck. Do the legwork on mortgage rates and costs on line before any application. Being "prequalified" means almost nothing. Above all ask questions. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kleckineau Posted July 6, 2014 Share Posted July 6, 2014 As an attorney who does real estate and taxes, 2 things: First, if you take money out of your pension ro 401K to buy a house, please know the rules.The bank or broker who holds the account can explain them; ask. Had a tax client who sold her old house and bought her dream house with a significant chunk of her 401k for the big ass upgrade and ASSUMED that that money was tax free. It was not her first home, and the "rollover" of capital gains no long applies(and hasn't for a while). I was not her attorney on the clsoing and did not advise her until she came to get her taxes done, simply review her tax paperwork. When I explained how much she owed to the feds for the 401K money even with a smll break on the penalty , she totally freaked the eff out. Second, please check with your mortgage rep how much will be available at closing and what the expected costs will be. If you take out, say, $200K on a mortgage, you are not getting the full amount to pay the seller, more likely $5K less. Small mortgage brokers are notorious for lowballing these costs because they make their money from a commission on your deal. They want you to close ASAP. But typically the smaller the bank or broker, the higher the costs. Of course they are going to be very accomodating to get you to close. A big bank is not going to be nearly as helpful, but they make money when they bundle your mortgage and thousands like it in the market as a investment. Typically their costs are going to be lower nut their customer service is gonna suck. Do the legwork on mortgage rates and costs on line before any application. Being "prequalified" means almost nothing. Above all ask questions. Couple of questions regarding 2 points you made. When withdrawing from a 401K federal law requires that in addition to the 10% penalty if under age 59 1/2, the 401K plan provider will be required to withhold 20% for federal income tax and 2-8% for state and local income taxes depending on state of residence. Simply put, didnt your clients 401K provider broke the law by not withholding tax money for her? Regarding capital gains from the sale of your home, present tax law is clear that when selling your primary residence, you can make up to $250,000 in profit if you are a single owner and double that if married and not owe any taxes. Prior to 1997, in order to avoid cap gains tax, tax laws required you to buy another home of the same or higher price but that changed with the tax payer relief act of 1997.The one caveat is that you must have lived in the home 2 of the previous 5 years before the sale. Why was your client obligated to pay cap gains on the sale of her home?? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SouthernJet Posted July 6, 2014 Share Posted July 6, 2014 As an attorney who does real estate and taxes, 2 things: First, if you take money out of your pension ro 401K to buy a house, please know the rules.The bank or broker who holds the account can explain them; ask. Had a tax client who sold her old house and bought her dream house with a significant chunk of her 401k for the big ass upgrade and ASSUMED that that money was tax free. It was not her first home, and the "rollover" of capital gains no long applies(and hasn't for a while). I was not her attorney on the clsoing and did not advise her until she came to get her taxes done, simply review her tax paperwork. When I explained how much she owed to the feds for the 401K money even with a smll break on the penalty , she totally freaked the eff out. Second, please check with your mortgage rep how much will be available at closing and what the expected costs will be. If you take out, say, $200K on a mortgage, you are not getting the full amount to pay the seller, more likely $5K less. Small mortgage brokers are notorious for lowballing these costs because they make their money from a commission on your deal. They want you to close ASAP. But typically the smaller the bank or broker, the higher the costs. Of course they are going to be very accomodating to get you to close. A big bank is not going to be nearly as helpful, but they make money when they bundle your mortgage and thousands like it in the market as a investment. Typically their costs are going to be lower nut their customer service is gonna suck. Do the legwork on mortgage rates and costs on line before any application. Being "prequalified" means almost nothing. Above all ask questions. nice post,, still get a rainmaker , take no prisoner shark Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bugg Posted July 6, 2014 Share Posted July 6, 2014 Couple of questions regarding 2 points you made. When withdrawing from a 401K federal law requires that in addition to the 10% penalty if under age 59 1/2, the 401K plan provider will be required to withhold 20% for federal income tax and 2-8% for state and local income taxes depending on state of residence. Simply put, didnt your clients 401K provider broke the law by not withholding tax money for her? Regarding capital gains from the sale of your home, present tax law is clear that when selling your primary residence, you can make up to $250,000 in profit if you are a single owner and double that if married and not owe any taxes. Prior to 1997, in order to avoid cap gains tax, tax laws required you to buy another home of the same or higher price but that changed with the tax payer relief act of 1997.The one caveat is that you must have lived in the home 2 of the previous 5 years before the sale. Why was your client obligated to pay cap gains on the sale of her home?? She did not owe any money on her sale. It was the 401K money that killed her. You can get capital gains relief up to $250K of a gain, $500K for married couples or widows and widowers. And if you did any fixup on your house, hard to see where msot people pay the CGT. Only time it has come up is when a client bought a house in a now hot neigborhood like Williamsburgh or Park Slope a long time ago for very little. One client bought a house in Fort Greene for peanuts in 1990 and sold it for $1.5 million, another inherited a house in Windsor Terrace and sold it for $1.3 million.Not a bad problem to have. The rollover ended in 1997. But some people still think that's applicable. You have to request or agree the withholding, but you will owe the taxes either way and might be subject to a penalty for failing to withhold. This...person...(who was younger than 59 1/2) again believed for reasons known only to herself that somehow it was tax free because...I really have no idea what the hell she was thinking. It is a really beautiful house, but she has a very big federal and state tax bill due that she did not remotely anticipate. Withholding is always voluntary, if advisable. Plausibly if we all stopped withholding....a man can dream. There is a reason April 15th and the first Tuesday in November are so far away from each other on the calendar. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kleckineau Posted July 6, 2014 Share Posted July 6, 2014 She did not owe any money on her sale. It was the 401K money that killed her. You can get capital gains relief up to $250K of a gain, $500K for married couples or widows and widowers. And if you did any fixup on your house, hard to see where msot people pay the CGT. Only time it has come up is when a client bought a house in a now hot neigborhood like Williamsburgh or Park Slope a long time ago for very little. One client bought a house in Fort Greene for peanuts in 1990 and sold it for $1.5 million, another inherited a house in Windsor Terrace and sold it for $1.3 million.Not a bad problem to have. The rollover ended in 1997. But some people still think that's applicable. You have to request or agree the withholding, but you will owe the taxes either way and might be subject to a penalty for failing to withhold. This...person...(who was younger than 59 1/2) again believed for reasons known only to herself that somehow it was tax free because...I really have no idea what the hell she was thinking. It is a really beautiful house, but she has a very big federal and state tax bill due that she did not remotely anticipate. Withholding is always voluntary, if advisable. Plausibly if we all stopped withholding....a man can dream. There is a reason April 15th and the first Tuesday in November are so far away from each other on the calendar. Thx. clear now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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