Jetlag Posted September 23, 2005 Share Posted September 23, 2005 I, Jetlag am running for the position of JetNation Union Representative. This unruly management has oppressed the massses for too long now. If you elect me as your Union rep I will strive to make JN a much better place to post in the years to come. Here is just a list of some of my demands for our new contract: - More alcohol (Aren't you tired of running out of Naddy Light as you're cruising JN??? I feel the same way.) - Better Healthcare ( Is your carpel tunnel hurting as much as mine? Ofcourse it is.) - More reliable retirement plan (This for the veterans who've spent hours upon hours working like slaves. They should be paying atleast 25% into our 401k.) - More nudity ( Where are the damn nuddy pics!?) - Retro payment ( For all of us who spent years on the other site and transferred here should be well compensated for all the time went underpaid.) - More alcohol (Never enough alcohol.) Patriot fans may join but will not be given as much seniority. A VOTE FOR JETLAG IS A VOTE FOR A BETTER FUTURE. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maxman Posted September 24, 2005 Share Posted September 24, 2005 If I vote for you will you promise that all Grab Bag gifts will arrive on time? If so, then you got my vote!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Preston Howley III Posted September 24, 2005 Share Posted September 24, 2005 I, Jetlag am running for the position of JetNation Union Representative. A VOTE FOR JETLAG IS A VOTE FOR A BETTER FUTURE. You sure you want the gig? Don't you remember what happened to Harry the union rep in Last Exit to Brooklyn? DONT LET THE DOOR HIT YOU IN THE AZZ ON THE WAY OUT, HARRY!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smizzy Posted September 24, 2005 Share Posted September 24, 2005 The people of jetnation have spoken. Thanks to tons of Pm's and e-mails we have complied a list of things the people of JN would like to see before you get our vote 1. Hand lotion installed in the crapper in all the mens bathrooms-TomShane 2. a Hostess Cupcake vending machine in the JetNation lounge- Maxman 3. Everything painted blue and silver- Patsfantx 4. a jukebox in the lounge-greengal 5.Cecil Fiedler poster in the lounge- Stormshadow/Gun of Piggyville Can we count on you? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maxman Posted September 24, 2005 Share Posted September 24, 2005 2. a Hostess Cupcake vending machine in the JetNation lounge- Maxman I am more of a Twinkie kind of guy! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jetheelz Posted September 24, 2005 Share Posted September 24, 2005 The people of jetnation have spoken. Thanks to tons of Pm's and e-mails we have complied a list of things the people of JN would like to see before you get our vote 1. Hand lotion installed in the crapper in all the mens bathrooms-TomShane 2. a Hostess Cupcake vending machine in the JetNation lounge- Maxman 3. Everything painted blue and silver- Patsfantx 4. a jukebox in the lounge-greengal 5.Cecil Fiedler poster in the lounge- Stormshadow/Gun of Piggyville Can we count on you? What about the rest of us? Do we get to add stuff to the list? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlackLabelJetsFan Posted September 24, 2005 Share Posted September 24, 2005 5.Cecil Fiedler poster in the lounge- Stormshadow/Gun of Piggyville Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Preston Howley III Posted September 24, 2005 Share Posted September 24, 2005 2. a Hostess Cupcake vending machine in the JetNation lounge- Maxman I want Sno-balls! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlackLabelJetsFan Posted September 24, 2005 Share Posted September 24, 2005 I demand a football helmet filled with cottage cheese, and naked pictures of Bea Arthur! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stormshadow19 Posted September 24, 2005 Share Posted September 24, 2005 I demand a football helmet filled with cottage cheese, and naked pictures of Bea Arthur! In addition to my Cecil poster wanting, I also want this! edited because I can't read, apparently Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gg Posted September 24, 2005 Share Posted September 24, 2005 4. a jukebox in the lounge-greengal excellent!! do i get to pick the tunes in it? if so ... you got my vote! hey maybe we can have a JN prom!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Preston Howley III Posted September 24, 2005 Share Posted September 24, 2005 Can we watch baseball games even when nurse Ratched says no? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jetheelz Posted September 24, 2005 Share Posted September 24, 2005 excellent!! do i get to pick the tunes in it? if so ... you got my vote! hey maybe we can have a JN prom!!!! As long as I get a dance. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Preston Howley III Posted September 24, 2005 Share Posted September 24, 2005 As long as I get a dance. Hey, aint you in a right to work state? If you don't have to pay dues, I aint paying dues, neither. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jetheelz Posted September 24, 2005 Share Posted September 24, 2005 Hey, aint you in a right to work state? If you don't have to pay dues, I aint paying dues, neither. Uh, I plead the fifth Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlackLabelJetsFan Posted September 24, 2005 Share Posted September 24, 2005 Uh, I plead the fifth And as quickly as it was gained, the solidarity of the Jet Nation masses crumbled. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gg Posted September 24, 2005 Share Posted September 24, 2005 And as quickly as it was gained, the solidarity of the Jet Nation masses crumbled. does that mean no prom??? i was already trying to think of a theme... and have been browsing the internet for my green or indigo dress! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jetheelz Posted September 24, 2005 Share Posted September 24, 2005 We have to have the lumberjack song Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlackLabelJetsFan Posted September 24, 2005 Share Posted September 24, 2005 does that mean no prom??? i was already trying to think of a theme... and have been browsing the internet for my green or indigo dress! This year's theme will be "Under The Sea" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlackLabelJetsFan Posted September 24, 2005 Share Posted September 24, 2005 We have to have the lumberjack song I'm a lumberjack and I'm OK I sleep all night and I work all day (He's a lumberjack and he's OK He sleeps all night and he works all day) I cut down trees, I eat my lunch I go to the lavat'ry On Wednesdays I go shopping And have buttered scones for tea (He cuts down trees, He eats his lunch) (He's a lumberjack and he's ok) I cut down trees, I skip and jump I love to press wild flow'rs I put on women's clothing And hang around in bars (He cuts down trees, He skips and jumps) (He's a lumberjack and he's ok) I cut down trees, I wear high heels Suspenders and a bra I wish I'd been a girlie Just like my dear papa (He cuts down trees, He wears high heels) (He's a lumberjack and he's ok) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jetheelz Posted September 24, 2005 Share Posted September 24, 2005 I'm a lumberjack and I'm OK I sleep all night and I work all day (He's a lumberjack and he's OK He sleeps all night and he works all day) I cut down trees, I eat my lunch I go to the lavat'ry On Wednesdays I go shopping And have buttered scones for tea (He cuts down trees, He eats his lunch) (He's a lumberjack and he's ok) I cut down trees, I skip and jump I love to press wild flow'rs I put on women's clothing And hang around in bars (He cuts down trees, He skips and jumps) (He's a lumberjack and he's ok) I cut down trees, I wear high heels Suspenders and a bra I wish I'd been a girlie Just like my dear papa (He cuts down trees, He wears high heels) (He's a lumberjack and he's ok) Thats what Im talking about!! Now the Knights of the Round table song from Holy Grail Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gg Posted September 24, 2005 Share Posted September 24, 2005 This year's theme will be "Under The Sea" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maxman Posted September 24, 2005 Share Posted September 24, 2005 I want Sno-balls! Check under the desk in the corner office. The name plate on the desk reads: Mr. Shane. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gg Posted September 24, 2005 Share Posted September 24, 2005 Thats what Im talking about!! Now the Knights of the Round table song from Holy Grail So go and get another shrub-ber-ry Then take this herring cut down that tree Ecky-ecky-ecky-ecky-pikang-zoop... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jetheelz Posted September 24, 2005 Share Posted September 24, 2005 So go and get another shrub-ber-ry Then take this herring cut down that tree Ecky-ecky-ecky-ecky-pikang-zoop... Now you must bring us another shrubbery... place it next to this shrubbery... then you will cut down the mightiest tree in the forest with.... A HERRING!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jetlag Posted September 24, 2005 Author Share Posted September 24, 2005 I will also work to abolish the hi-jacking of threads. I know this has been a large hindrance to the great JetNation populus. JetMoses - There will be a $55 annual fee along with a $55 entrance fee which will be garnished from your first 2 paychecks, which I promise will be much larger. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stormshadow19 Posted September 24, 2005 Share Posted September 24, 2005 In addition to the Cecil poster, the football helmet full of cottage cheese, and the naked picture of Bea Arthur, I also want more thread hijackings, more honesty, more Lions bashing (when deserved), more Hockey talk, a giant baby bottle, a bass with a dragon neck, a Gibson Hummingbird, A Fender Strat, and for you to promise you'll find the "real" killer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jetlag Posted September 24, 2005 Author Share Posted September 24, 2005 In addition to the Cecil poster, the football helmet full of cottage cheese, and the naked picture of Bea Arthur, I also want more thread hijackings, more honesty, more Lions bashing (when deserved), more Hockey talk, a giant baby bottle, a bass with a dragon neck, a Gibson Hummingbird, A Fender Strat, and for you to promise you'll find the "real" killer. I have one question for you. Who'd win in a fight Lemmy or God? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
isired Posted September 24, 2005 Share Posted September 24, 2005 for each, a vanity plate... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maxman Posted September 24, 2005 Share Posted September 24, 2005 Will lap dances be made available to us? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stormshadow19 Posted September 24, 2005 Share Posted September 24, 2005 I have one question for you. Who'd win in a fight Lemmy or God? Trick question! Lemmy IS god! My turn... you know who the Lemmy is they speak of, right? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jetlag Posted September 24, 2005 Author Share Posted September 24, 2005 Trick question! Lemmy IS god! My turn... you know who the Lemmy is they speak of, right? Not a big fan but Lemmy from Motorhead I'm assuming. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jetlag Posted September 24, 2005 Author Share Posted September 24, 2005 Will lap dances be made available to us? You're management. Get the hell out of our union meeting. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maxman Posted September 24, 2005 Share Posted September 24, 2005 You're management. Get the hell out of our union meeting. Alright I will be in the parking lot with the strippers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jetlag Posted September 24, 2005 Author Share Posted September 24, 2005 Alright I will be in the parking lot with the strippers. Have fun buddy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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