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Crushers fat gut

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Everything posted by Crushers fat gut

  1. Unfortunately toilet paper in this country is just not made large or durable enough to accoomodate the massive job that is wiping his a$$. He's taken to using beach towels of late. He buys a dozen for a couple bucks at walmart and then mrs. crusher takes them out back and burns them.
  2. We had the same problem, actually worse, crusher just didn't fit. So he ripped the sink/cabinet off the wall and uses the bathtub as his sink
  3. I think you have me confused with the pool cover you bought to use as an after hose down robe..
  4. Can this be used to lock crusher out of the bathroom?
  5. And I thought humans found it unpleasant to eat while taking a crap, until i met you
  6. I think it's a load of crap
  7. He loves his family. Needs to keep the stanch in. Understand, when he walks by it's like a 747 flying by, a huge vacuum is created in his wake. If polluted with noxious methane gas from swamp a$$, it'd be highly volatile and likely to explode if encountering flame. Like the burners in the kitchen that are constantly going for the hourly meals poor Mrs. Crusher is forced to make. If i'm not mistaken, he's legally bound by HAZMAT laws
  8. Those poor souls. Anytime I'm feeling bad for myself, I think of them.
  9. His swamp a$$ would kill off anything living in that area. I've heard them discussing using it around the property line to keep all kinds of critters away
  10. Finally something we agree on. Go sit on this Jif person and poop. I'll take surf vacations and give the golden showers from now on.
  11. Monkey throwing poop > Crusher a$$ spraying poop
  12. I wish he'd moderate his food intake!
  13. I'm very familiar with clogs, it's a daily occurance in my place of business. I can bring some friends to help; CrushersToiletSnake, CrushersPlunger and Crusher'sJackHammer (used in case of emergency)
  14. If i ever locate your testicles amongst the sea of blubber you call thighs, they are mine. This is just the begginning, better buy a plunger and a mop.
  15. I think he's crusher's other toilet seat.
  16. Is this game toilet seat friendly? I have one mission, kill crusher
  17. Cyber bullying would be an vacation compared to what I go through on a regular basis.
  18. Describing your mistreatment here for these kind people is not helping your cause. I've filed grievances with the union, and they agree, my liviing conditions are deplorable. With the amount of time we spend together, you'd think you'd want to get a long better. Another thing we need to discuss is lifting the seat up to pee. Is it really that difficult to lean over and lift the seat up? Aren't I cold enough that I don't need to wet down before you rest your large bottom on me? Maybe it's just time to lose the false pride, succomb to gravity and begin taking a seat to pee. And this one isn't just for me, I've got complaints from half the bathroom on this one. How you manage to get urine on something that is 10 feet directly behind you, I'll never know, but it needs to change. Baby crusher had better aim as a toddler.
  19. As someone who spends almost as much time with crusher's a$$ as Jif, I hope my brother returns home safely.
  20. Ever hear of the National Toilet Seat Union #432? Yeah, that's right, we're in contact, and we've unionized you slob. Your house is now a union shop. No union member seat will serve here.
  21. Right? And that's only the beginning, i've got the freaken trap up my a$$ since last month when the mother****er passed a license plate. He's like a freaken shark! That thing scraped the hell from the base of the bowl to the end of the trap and ever since then they've been threatening to strike. This has been building for years. We won't back down.
  22. Absolutely not. We've spoken to Mrs. Crusher, she's agreed to dig you a hole in the backyard to use, otherwise we start attacking her and the children.
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