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Married Sex.


Integrity28

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I can't argue with that statement. It might be true of all married women. It certainly was of me. Hell, I'd rather have cleaned the oven.

Understood.

This is mostly on the male.

Single men will spend money like crazy, lie, rub feet, wash your car, act like we like chick flicks, take you shopping, give up our friends and even ignore family to get a sexual audition. Most married dudes wont even take a shower or even act nicely to get encores. They think it;s should be automatic. Married dudes are their own worst enemy,

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Understood.

This is mostly on the male.

Single men will spend money like crazy, lie, rub feet, wash your car, act like we like chick flicks, take you shopping, give up our friends and even ignore family to get a sexual audition. Most married dudes wont even take a shower or even act nicely to get encores. They think it;s should be automatic. Married dudes are their own worst enemy,

Men, in general, tend to be their own worst enemy.

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I still can't get over the fact that you waited 14 years to marry her. She's clearly the most saint-like woman around. What took you so long? That's the length of my entire marriage. Of course, our sex life went downhill after the wedding. DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT make her do it in the exact same position every time with the exact same moves. Be a better man than my ex. Please.

Met in college = 3 years

Long distance after college = 1 year

I moved to the midwest, we both became miserable and broke, we didn't let it ruin the relationship though, we focused on career and moving back east = 4 years

We moved to Boston, repaired ourselves financially, focused on careers, I was in position to take the next step and my company went under = 4 years

Still in Boston, without a job but doing contract work around the clock, made a ton of quick money, got a new job, thenrelocated around Boston to improve our quality of life and started looking for houses = 1.5 years

Moved to the neighborhood we want a house in, got married and had her father pass away = the past 6-9 months

As you can see, it is the move to the midwest that set us back a lot. Neither of us would have ever gotten married in college, or long distance, those 4 years don't count. Then when the midwest turned into disaster it almost ended everything. We weren't in the state of mind or relationship for marriage.

We got healthy - personally, financially and together, here in Boston. We basically had to fall in love again though, it never left, we had to get back in the practice of it. Midwest had us constantly worried about money, with no social life, and working for crooks that were holding us back in our careers.

We've essentially had 4 relationships together... college sweethearts, long distance, miserable in the midwest, and two kids falling in love all over again here in the northeast. Marriage was never a big priority for either of us, it's always been more important to cultivate the relationship, keep it healthy, new and go out and experience things together.

In essence, we've never not been married... we just decided to go through with the formal, official marriage now, because we want BABIES!!!!

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Understood.

This is mostly on the male.

Single men will spend money like crazy, lie, rub feet, wash your car, act like we like chick flicks, take you shopping, give up our friends and even ignore family to get a sexual audition. Most married dudes wont even take a shower or even act nicely to get encores. They think it;s should be automatic. Married dudes are their own worst enemy,

Yes it is mostly on the male, and per your comments above it always has been. To get some, men mostly have to bend over backwards. Even the most sexually adventurous women I've known always had to be warmed up at least a little. Sex just is not something women initiate a strong majority of the time. As for marriage specifically, I think it was Reuters where I just read that a study showed married women in today's society, as busy as they've ever been in careers etc, prefer a book to sex. Wish women would just initiate more often, it makes it more exciting.

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She just initiated seks an hour ago. Go figure. Maybe she reads JN

Nice. I got the "I can't wait until after date night tonight, let's do it before work" sex this morning. Started in the bathroom on the sink, ended in bed... missed our train, lol

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Understood.

This is mostly on the male.

Single men will spend money like crazy, lie, rub feet, wash your car, act like we like chick flicks, take you shopping, give up our friends and even ignore family to get a sexual audition. Most married dudes wont even take a shower or even act nicely to get encores. They think it;s should be automatic. Married dudes are their own worst enemy,

You know, those things are nice and they are missed after the wedding, but the worst is that suddenly my feelings about things weren't important anymore. You guys are probably going to kick me out for turning a thread about sex into a thread about feelings, but for women, they are very much entertwined.

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You know, those things are nice and they are missed after the wedding, but the worst is that suddenly my feelings about things weren't important anymore. You guys are probably going to kick me out for turning a thread about sex into a thread about feelings, but for women, they are very much entertwined.

I have feelings about sex. I LOVE IT!!!!

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You know, those things are nice and they are missed after the wedding, but the worst is that suddenly my feelings about things weren't important anymore. You guys are probably going to kick me out for turning a thread about sex into a thread about feelings, but for women, they are very much entertwined.

Are you saying that after the wedding you stopped caring about those things, or that your husband stopped caring about your feelings and you miss the little things?

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Yes it is mostly on the male, and per your comments above it always has been. To get some, men mostly have to bend over backwards. Even the most sexually adventurous women I've known always had to be warmed up at least a little. Sex just is not something women initiate a strong majority of the time. As for marriage specifically, I think it was Reuters where I just read that a study showed married women in today's society, as busy as they've ever been in careers etc, prefer a book to sex. Wish women would just initiate more often, it makes it more exciting.

I feel bad for those married woman. It does not have to be that way. Sadly once it gets that way nothing can be done. I have been there. It's a sad sad sad place. I will never disagree if you pick the wrong woman your done. My opinion is based on my experiences and the experience of anyone who decided to share with Dr Crushlove.

I think sometimes woman initiate it but we miss it cause we have preconceived notions and woman are mysterious. It's awesome.

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You know, those things are nice and they are missed after the wedding, but the worst is that suddenly my feelings about things weren't important anymore. You guys are probably going to kick me out for turning a thread about sex into a thread about feelings, but for women, they are very much entertwined.

I find with men or woman nobody likes being taken for granted. I think people need to hug always. Hugging makes you feel important. Not groups hugs those blow. But big old strong make a honey lose her breathe kind. SPECIAL,

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Psychiatry wil tell you that "passion," is a temporary delusion, as is the idea of unconditional love between two parties. We are not monogamous by nature, and its nearly impossible to coordinate your evolving emotional needs witn the vacillating egoistic needs of one's partner--the things that cause us to be "in love" with a partner change over the course of time, at varying and unpredictable intervals. Often, the burden of trying to meet those changing needs combines with one's own disappointment in not recognizing a like effort from the partner, and is what causes ordinarily normal people to seek out a third, supplementary party. We bang the waitress and the pool boy--not simply to get laid--but because it artificially assuages our most basic, yet primarily eschewed (in a union), emotional needs. Granted, the fulfillment of those needs (vis a vis the waitress or pool boy) is also a delusion, but the placebo effect of feeling desirable, powerful, and at the same time, sado-masochistic, is not dissimilar to taking aspirin to ease a headache. It's much easier to blunt the symptoms than it is to address the root cause of that headache.

Those mythic couples who are hot for each other after two years necessarily divert and/or supplement the intensity of their feelings for each other via having children, or finding a common, unifying external purpose (ie running a business together, or becoming overly invested in a charity or hobby).

IMO, the trick to maintaining a long-lasting relationship is to recognize and embrace your inner whore and to not deny each other access to the most primal and subjugatory aspects of a physical relationship. Just because you become a "Mrs." doesn't mean you should deny yourself desires of a "Miss." Never pretend that you're not the waitress anymore.

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Psychiatry wil tell you that "passion," is a temporary delusion, as is the idea of unconditional love between two parties. We are not monogamous by nature, and its nearly impossible to coordinate your evolving emotional needs witn the vacillating egoistic needs of one's partner--the things that cause us to be "in love" with a partner change over the course of time, at varying and unpredictable intervals. Often, the burden of trying to meet those changing needs combines with one's own disappointment in not recognizing a like effort from the partner, and is what causes ordinarily normal people to seek out a third, supplementary party. We bang the waitress and the pool boy--not simply to get laid--but because it artificially assuages our most basic, yet primarily eschewed (in a union), emotional needs. Granted, the fulfillment of those needs (vis a vis the waitress or pool boy) is also a delusion, but the placebo effect of feeling desirable, powerful, and at the same time, sado-masochistic, is not dissimilar to taking aspirin to ease a headache. It's much easier to blunt the symptoms than it is to address the root cause of that headache.

Those mythic couples who are hot for each other after two years necessarily divert and/or supplement the intensity of their feelings for each other via having children, or finding a common, unifying external purpose (ie running a business together, or becoming overly invested in a charity or hobby).

IMO, the trick to maintaining a long-lasting relationship is to recognize and embrace your inner whore and to not deny each other access to the most primal and subjugatory aspects of a physical relationship. Just because you become a "Mrs." doesn't mean you should deny yourself desires of a "Miss." Never pretend that you're not the waitress anymore.

I 100% disagree.

No matter how hard people try that they get bored with one another. The real key is to keep the relationship healthy is non sexual physical contact. NOT SAYING SEX IS NOT IMPORTANT. but it's important to always hold, hug and caress your woman every day if it ends up in pay out or not.

She must feel desired by you always not just when you wanna bang. If you do that then when you bang her inner whore is charged up and ready to do work son.

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I 100% disagree.

No matter how hard people try that they get bored with one another. The real key is to keep the relationship healthy is non sexual physical contact. NOT SAYING SEX IS NOT IMPORTANT. but it's important to always hold, hug and caress your woman every day if it ends up in pay out or not.

She must feel desired by you always not just when you wanna bang. If you do that then when you bang her inner whore is charged up and ready to do work son.

My point was that even if she's driving the family Volvo to PTA meetings, it doesn't excuse her from wearing the butt plug.

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I 100% disagree.

No matter how hard people try that they get bored with one another. The real key is to keep the relationship healthy is non sexual physical contact. NOT SAYING SEX IS NOT IMPORTANT. but it's important to always hold, hug and caress your woman every day if it ends up in pay out or not.

She must feel desired by you always not just when you wanna bang. If you do that then when you bang her inner whore is charged up and ready to do work son.

Agree with Crusher, this is why my relationship keeps getting better.

Tomshane's post reads like the long-winded rationalization of a scumbag who likes to cheat. The discipline of loyalty should be a point of pride in a relationship, not a disheartening drawback.

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Agree with Crusher, this is why my relationship keeps getting better.

Tomshane's post reads like the long-winded rationalization of a scumbag who likes to cheat. The discipline of loyalty should be a point of pride in a relationship, not a disheartening drawback.

I'm giving voice to the plight of attractive people.

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