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BREAKING: NFL Releases Mandatory Post-Game Complaint Form for Patriots Opponents


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Breaking News: The NFL has announced the implementation of a standardized complaint form for all future opponents of the New England Patriots. All Patriots opponents are expected to fill this form out and submit it to the league after each loss to the Patriots, to streamline the process, and to assure their fans and the league that they would have won, but for the Patriots misbehavior. The NFL is also encouraging teams and fans to submit new Patriots shenanigans, which will be evaluated and added as needed.

NFL Post-Loss Complaint Form

The NFL League Office distributed this form to all future Patriots opponents to streamline the complaint process

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Bernie Madoff had something similar for disgruntled investors who were forever wanting to complain about things.

After investigating their complaints I believe the findings of the investigation were...

We didn't do it (check)

It wasn't against SEC rules (check)

OK even if it was against SEC rules everyone else did it too (check)

OK even if everyone else did not do it they were doing things that were just as bad (check)

So even if that last one is not true then we made no money from the practice (check) 

This is all a smear campaign by our competitors who are jealous of our success (check)

and so on and so forth....

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Pats fans are ridiculously insecure.  It's bizarre. 

It would be 100X better if they just admitted their team cheated and say they didn't care because they got 4 awesome Super Bowl seasons plus a bunch of division titles out of the deal.  But instead they just repeat the company line and make it worse with a whole lot of cognitive dissonance and rage mixed in the cocktail. 

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ffurrryIEbeeie (that will only take 2 weeks)

you don't seem to understand that nobody here respects the pats* or take them seriously. 

I have challenged other chowds, and they have all been too chicken to accept my challenge

will you ?

I don't know of any Pats fans that cares if a Jets fan respects the Patriots or not.


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