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911 Call: Two Bigfoot Attack Man Sleeping In His Camper


SoFlaJets
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and this guy is so scared that he's crying like a little girl...and so would I. You can actually hear them banging on the trailer as they try to turn it over with him inside with his dog. Cops finally find him way back in the woods at 3:00 something in the morning...but take the 20 minutes and listen to what this guy is going through.

 

 

 

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UT, there is this guy Brent Sawin and he does an online bigfoot paranormal podcast and he had a veteran on who told the most amazing story about his unit being sent in to take care of a Sasquatch family who was "in the way" of the DEA agents trying to  make a bust on some big pot farm. Apparently, the mother Squatch got her leg caught in a big bear trap that the pot farmers had put out and the alpha male was protecting her and the baby and two teenage Squatches. This soldier told about them firing bucu rounds into this monster and it was like mosquito bites to it. He also related how the thing with ONE HAND putting it over the guy's head and just ripping the soldier's head clean off "like he was opening a can of beer" was the way that he described it. This is a story that obviously has had some bad effects on him and everyone who was there that day.If anyone is interested I will post it but if no one is interested or just thinks it's a bunch of BS then I won't.

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14 hours ago, SoFlaJets said:

UT, there is this guy Brent Sawin and he does an online bigfoot paranormal podcast and he had a veteran on who told the most amazing story about his unit being sent in to take care of a Sasquatch family who was "in the way" of the DEA agents trying to  make a bust on some big pot farm. Apparently, the mother Squatch got her leg caught in a big bear trap that the pot farmers had put out and the alpha male was protecting her and the baby and two teenage Squatches. This soldier told about them firing bucu rounds into this monster and it was like mosquito bites to it. He also related how the thing with ONE HAND putting it over the guy's head and just ripping the soldier's head clean off "like he was opening a can of beer" was the way that he described it. This is a story that obviously has had some bad effects on him and everyone who was there that day.If anyone is interested I will post it but if no one is interested or just thinks it's a bunch of BS then I won't.

I'd listen even if it is bs

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15 hours ago, SoFlaJets said:

UT, there is this guy Brent Sawin and he does an online bigfoot paranormal podcast and he had a veteran on who told the most amazing story about his unit being sent in to take care of a Sasquatch family who was "in the way" of the DEA agents trying to  make a bust on some big pot farm. Apparently, the mother Squatch got her leg caught in a big bear trap that the pot farmers had put out and the alpha male was protecting her and the baby and two teenage Squatches. This soldier told about them firing bucu rounds into this monster and it was like mosquito bites to it. He also related how the thing with ONE HAND putting it over the guy's head and just ripping the soldier's head clean off "like he was opening a can of beer" was the way that he described it. This is a story that obviously has had some bad effects on him and everyone who was there that day.If anyone is interested I will post it but if no one is interested or just thinks it's a bunch of BS then I won't.

This might be my all time favorite post in the history of the internet.  

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18 hours ago, SoFlaJets said:

UT, there is this guy Brent Sawin and he does an online bigfoot paranormal podcast and he had a veteran on who told the most amazing story about his unit being sent in to take care of a Sasquatch family who was "in the way" of the DEA agents trying to  make a bust on some big pot farm. Apparently, the mother Squatch got her leg caught in a big bear trap that the pot farmers had put out and the alpha male was protecting her and the baby and two teenage Squatches. This soldier told about them firing bucu rounds into this monster and it was like mosquito bites to it. He also related how the thing with ONE HAND putting it over the guy's head and just ripping the soldier's head clean off "like he was opening a can of beer" was the way that he described it. This is a story that obviously has had some bad effects on him and everyone who was there that day.If anyone is interested I will post it but if no one is interested or just thinks it's a bunch of BS then I won't.

Quality fiction. I'm open minded to a descendant of gigantopithicus or a tribe of Neanderthals being behind the sightings but whoever dreamed up that story watches too many bad movies on cable TV 

The mountain gorilla was just a mysterious creature locals spoke about until as recently as 1920 and some interesting hair samples have been found but squat ching has become big business so buyer beware 

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On 8/12/2018 at 6:26 PM, SoFlaJets said:

UT, there is this guy Brent Sawin and he does an online bigfoot paranormal podcast and he had a veteran on who told the most amazing story about his unit being sent in to take care of a Sasquatch family who was "in the way" of the DEA agents trying to  make a bust on some big pot farm. Apparently, the mother Squatch got her leg caught in a big bear trap that the pot farmers had put out and the alpha male was protecting her and the baby and two teenage Squatches. This soldier told about them firing bucu rounds into this monster and it was like mosquito bites to it. He also related how the thing with ONE HAND putting it over the guy's head and just ripping the soldier's head clean off "like he was opening a can of beer" was the way that he described it. This is a story that obviously has had some bad effects on him and everyone who was there that day.If anyone is interested I will post it but if no one is interested or just thinks it's a bunch of BS then I won't.

You're right. That IS an amazing story.

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On 8/12/2018 at 6:26 PM, SoFlaJets said:

UT, there is this guy Brent Sawin and he does an online bigfoot paranormal podcast and he had a veteran on who told the most amazing story about his unit being sent in to take care of a Sasquatch family who was "in the way" of the DEA agents trying to  make a bust on some big pot farm. Apparently, the mother Squatch got her leg caught in a big bear trap that the pot farmers had put out and the alpha male was protecting her and the baby and two teenage Squatches. This soldier told about them firing bucu rounds into this monster and it was like mosquito bites to it. He also related how the thing with ONE HAND putting it over the guy's head and just ripping the soldier's head clean off "like he was opening a can of beer" was the way that he described it. This is a story that obviously has had some bad effects on him and everyone who was there that day.If anyone is interested I will post it but if no one is interested or just thinks it's a bunch of BS then I won't.

I'm pretty open-minded when it comes to cryptozoology, but this story sounds a little nutty--especially the part about ripping a dude's head off. Still, your summary is a fun read. 

giphy.gif

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On 8/12/2018 at 5:26 PM, SoFlaJets said:

UT, there is this guy Brent Sawin and he does an online bigfoot paranormal podcast and he had a veteran on who told the most amazing story about his unit being sent in to take care of a Sasquatch family who was "in the way" of the DEA agents trying to  make a bust on some big pot farm. Apparently, the mother Squatch got her leg caught in a big bear trap that the pot farmers had put out and the alpha male was protecting her and the baby and two teenage Squatches. This soldier told about them firing bucu rounds into this monster and it was like mosquito bites to it. He also related how the thing with ONE HAND putting it over the guy's head and just ripping the soldier's head clean off "like he was opening a can of beer" was the way that he described it. This is a story that obviously has had some bad effects on him and everyone who was there that day.If anyone is interested I will post it but if no one is interested or just thinks it's a bunch of BS then I won't.

Some of this stuff can be fun, but I can’t buy into it.

I can’t help but think that if there were 8 foot tall apes wandering around the woods of North America, we would’ve found some concrete evidence by now. 

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4 hours ago, Untouchable said:

Some of this stuff can be fun, but I can’t buy into it.

I can’t help but think that if there were 8 foot tall apes wandering around the woods of North America, we would’ve found some concrete evidence by now. 

Yeah, it's kind of a hard sell considering that the vast majority of the continent has at least some degree of permanent residents in it. That said, there is a lot of "wilderness" land up in Canada, and some of the forests in the Northwest are dense enough for a breeding population of Bigfoot (Bigfeet?) to reside if they're secretive enough. 

One interesting point in addition: I was watching one of those dumbass Bigfoot hunting shows on the History Channel (or something similar) a while back, and they did an experiment showing how quickly a dead animal is consumed by predators, bugs, maggots and all that junk out in the wild. They did time-lapse footage of a dead deer and the corpse was completely gone in a matter of days. That was their reasoning as to why no one had ever discovered a dead Bigfoot. 

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4 hours ago, Bombdirt said:

Yeah, it's kind of a hard sell considering that the vast majority of the continent has at least some degree of permanent residents in it. That said, there is a lot of "wilderness" land up in Canada, and some of the forests in the Northwest are dense enough for a breeding population of Bigfoot (Bigfeet?) to reside if they're secretive enough. 

One interesting point in addition: I was watching one of those dumbass Bigfoot hunting shows on the History Channel (or something similar) a while back, and they did an experiment showing how quickly a dead animal is consumed by predators, bugs, maggots and all that junk out in the wild. They did time-lapse footage of a dead deer and the corpse was completely gone in a matter of days. That was their reasoning as to why no one had ever discovered a dead Bigfoot. 

Interesting. 

30 of the most intriguing hair samples were tested and they all came back as known animals native to the area with a few interesting exceptions like polar bears in Asia but the interesting thing is there is basically no difference between Neanderthals and modern humans as far as the hair DNA test is concerned so there is a tiny possibility one of those hairs is Neanderthal but very unlikely 

 

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*Puts tinfoil hat on*

This is a coelacanth. It was thought to have gone extinct five million years ago before its rediscovery in 1938. The first time a live specimen was caught on video came in the last decade or so. 

giphy-downsized-large.gif

This is exhibit number one according to cryptozoologist nerds. Could it mean that Aquaman is a real thing? Probably. 

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Listen guys, I know that the whole idea of a bigfoot is something that gets a bunch of yucks and all but I have been doing a lot of studying and investigating for the past decade and these creatures are very real and very dangerous and if any of you do any camping please heed the warnings of this ex-FBI agent David Paulides who investigates cases of people who go missing in the parks all around the USA. Children, who seemingly just vanish into thin air. Watch your babies at the campsites, and especially the trails because these monsters grab innocent people and they are never seen again. Listen to some of his latest cases above.

 

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  • 4 weeks later...

So we're clear... Strong enough to rip head clean off.  Strong enough to withstand multiple gunshot wounds with no damage.  Not strong enough to open bear trap?

Also, no name or investigation of decapitated soldier?  No photographs taken of never before seen creature in bear trap?  No blood or hair collected after the fact for DNA analysis?

Seems legit.

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4 hours ago, TeddEY said:

So we're clear... Strong enough to rip head clean off.  Strong enough to withstand multiple gunshot wounds with no damage.  Not strong enough to open bear trap?

Also, no name or investigation of decapitated soldier?  No photographs taken of never before seen creature in bear trap?  No blood or hair collected after the fact for DNA analysis?

Seems legit.

It's all a part of the cover-up, you Sasquatch shill.

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On 8/14/2018 at 2:48 PM, Bombdirt said:

Yeah, it's kind of a hard sell considering that the vast majority of the continent has at least some degree of permanent residents in it. That said, there is a lot of "wilderness" land up in Canada, and some of the forests in the Northwest are dense enough for a breeding population of Bigfoot (Bigfeet?) to reside if they're secretive enough. 

One interesting point in addition: I was watching one of those dumbass Bigfoot hunting shows on the History Channel (or something similar) a while back, and they did an experiment showing how quickly a dead animal is consumed by predators, bugs, maggots and all that junk out in the wild. They did time-lapse footage of a dead deer and the corpse was completely gone in a matter of days. That was their reasoning as to why no one had ever discovered a dead Bigfoot. 

Up here in Maine, a buddy of mine has trail cam pics of what looks like a baby bigfoot.

I saw the pics myself, and I dont know what the F else it could be. We dont have anything up here that could be mistaken for that, everything up here has 4 legs, even most women.

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7 hours ago, BUM-KNEE said:

Up here in Maine, a buddy of mine has trail cam pics of what looks like a baby bigfoot.

I saw the pics myself, and I dont know what the F else it could be. We dont have anything up here that could be mistaken for that, everything up here has 4 legs, even most women.

Don't tease me like that. It's like saying your friend has pictures of what looks like Jennifer Garner making out with Betty Ford.  

Is it believable? No. Is it possible? Yes. Do I want to see pictures of it, even if they're fake? You bet your ass I do. 

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On 9/13/2018 at 5:13 PM, BUM-KNEE said:

Up here in Maine, a buddy of mine has trail cam pics of what looks like a baby bigfoot.

I saw the pics myself, and I dont know what the F else it could be. We dont have anything up here that could be mistaken for that, everything up here has 4 legs, even most women.

Is there any chance you could get the pics and post them in here? I need something to divert my attention from the fact that we might lose to the Browns on Thursday. 

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On 9/13/2018 at 1:45 PM, TeddEY said:

So we're clear... Strong enough to rip head clean off.  Strong enough to withstand multiple gunshot wounds with no damage.  Not strong enough to open bear trap?

Also, no name or investigation of decapitated soldier?  No photographs taken of never before seen creature in bear trap?  No blood or hair collected after the fact for DNA analysis?

Seems legit.

That's a real good point Teddy, I don't know but maybe the Alpha male got there just as the Military unit arrived and it didn't have a chance to figure it out yet. I could have been preoccupied with trying to get the rest of the family out of there and safe. 

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On 9/13/2018 at 1:45 PM, TeddEY said:

So we're clear... Strong enough to rip head clean off.  Strong enough to withstand multiple gunshot wounds with no damage.  Not strong enough to open bear trap?

Also, no name or investigation of decapitated soldier?  No photographs taken of never before seen creature in bear trap?  No blood or hair collected after the fact for DNA analysis?

Seems legit.

That's a real good point EY, I don't know but maybe the Alpha male got there just as the Military unit arrived and it didn't have a chance to figure it out yet. It also was preoccupied with trying to get the rest of the family out of there and safe, according to the Sgt's account they were doing that Samurai chatter back and forth. 

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On 9/13/2018 at 1:45 PM, TeddEY said:

So we're clear... Strong enough to rip head clean off.  Strong enough to withstand multiple gunshot wounds with no damage.  Not strong enough to open bear trap?

Also, no name or investigation of decapitated soldier?  No photographs taken of never before seen creature in bear trap?  No blood or hair collected after the fact for DNA analysis?

Seems legit.

That's a real good point EY, I don't know but maybe the Alpha male got there just as the Military unit arrived and it didn't have a chance to figure it out yet. It also was preoccupied with trying to get the rest of the family out of there and safe, according to the Sgt's account they were doing that Samurai chatter back and forth. 

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