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Nolder

Not Mafia 1: The Dungeon of Dread

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@Spoot-Face sorry bud, give me till this evening.. exec meetings all day, no time to play fantasy role playing games with my internet friends till later 

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5 hours ago, Spoot-Face said:

Now that that's outta the way...

Despite every natural urge of mine screaming to probe the hole, my tiny halfling brain thinks it an obvious trap.

@CTM What say you, strong virile companion of mine?

Lol, let's check them leave piles

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15 hours ago, Nolder said:

As an adult, you stand 5'9" tall and weigh about 150 pounds.

Also, so I'm a ******* lady boy like jiff? Ffs

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1 hour ago, Nolder said:

DO YOU WISH TO...

1) TRY TO STEP INTO THE SIDE TUNNEL WITHOUT BEING DISCOVERED

2) STAND AND FIGHT THE ORC

Can we keep the orc as a pet, name him crusher and make fat jokes at his expense for the rest of the adventure ? Cause if so I choose that

If not, let's kill it. What say you @Spoot-Face

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2 hours ago, The Crusher said:

A narcoleptic, a hippie and a beaver playing Dungeon and Dragons. I kid you not. 

This + a gay and a fatty doing their best Statler and Waldorf impressions 

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1 hour ago, Nolder said:

DO YOU WISH TO...

1) ENTER THE ROOM AND FACE THE BABOON

2) LEAVE THE BABOON AND GO DOWN THE CORRIDOR ON THE RIGHT

I think the obvious choice here is to work towards exterminating integrity28, so I'd vote #1

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15 minutes ago, Spoot-Face said:

Zoinks! Me cowardly brain thinks we should run, unless, @CTM, you think you and all your 5'9 150 Ib twinkish frame can take on the brute!

I dunno, I assumed slaying the ape meant we won.

The ape is dead and there is joy in nerdville

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Lets run though 

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15 hours ago, Spoot-Face said:

I say leave the key, too dangerous methinks. And the doorway on the left seems suspect, as if it's tempting us into a false sense of security with the cool breeze.

I say leave through the doorway on the right.

 

15 hours ago, Spoot-Face said:

And I think the key is an obvious trap/lure, anyway.

My temptation is to try and figure out how to get the key but willing to go to the right door

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4 minutes ago, Spoot-Face said:

Flip a coin, then? We can have @Nolder flip a coin for us (or use an internet widget) and tell us who wins. You win, we stay to get the key, I win we go right door?

You call heads/tails.

Tails never fails 

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8 minutes ago, Spoot-Face said:

Good call on the key, @CTM.

Now, the left corridor would seem to lead up to the surface, and I'm betting the right one leads further into the cave/mountain, and the latter will be, imo, where the treasure is -- or more danger.

Still, I vote we go right.

Let's go right 

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13 hours ago, Spoot-Face said:

I vote we run away like little bitches. I'd rather not have a giant try to use me as a tampon.

As much af I'd like to impale a giants anus with your diminutive body, I concur. Run

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48 minutes ago, Spoot-Face said:

It goes without saying that my first instinct is to follow the stream and avoid being munched on, but there's no guarantee that the it's there now, so I could be convinced to follow the tracks.

Go for treasure imo 

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8 minutes ago, Spoot-Face said:

Hmmmm. No, it actually seems to be more of a JiF/Crusher hybrid species.

Well they've banged a ton and jif definitely skews female on the gender spectrum, im thinking its thier demon off spring 

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Just now, Spoot-Face said:

@CTM do you want to stay and be sexually accosted and then eaten by the JiF/Crusher thing?

Or run?

We should deffo run imo

I got it wrong last time so let's run 

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I'll be indisposed for the evening, going to see Hiromi at the Annenberg center in philly..

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2 hours ago, Nolder said:

What's that?

The most ferocious jazz pianist since I dunno, Art Tatum?

 

  • Post of the Week 1

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9 hours ago, Spoot-Face said:

Okay, just watched the full video, and, I have to say, coming from a guy who finds most of his music in the many persuasions of metal, that was one of the most intensely kick-ass pieces of music from three supremely eclectic musicians. I was gonna have that playing in the background while I did some other stuff on my PC, but I could not pull my eyes away. They were incredibly entertaining to watch.

Wow. Oh my. So good. 'Nuff said.

That's awesome! Made my morning :)

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5 hours ago, Nolder said:

So....it's over. The other path where you fight the pudding led to death I checked.

Technically this is a good ending even though you didn't achieve your goal of defeating the wizard or getting treasure.

Except the book is pretending like you got treasure so there must have been another path that led to this one where there was treasure along the way, so we'll just pretend like you found a small pile of treasure after killing the baboon or something.

 

Anyway, wow guys thanks for doing that with me and sorry for making you wait I didn't realize it was the end.

I know these books are kind of cheesy but I had fun going through that story with you.

And hey these usually end in death so considering I only gave you guys 2 lives you did pretty good only dying once.

I think going forward even if more people want to participate I'm going to keep the 2 life rule (as in 3rd strike and you're "out") just to keep everyone on their toes and not turn the adventure into an easy god mode type thing.

 

Speaking of which I am down to play some mafia now but if not enough people are up for a game yet I could do another one of these choose your own adventure books. Or not if no one is interested lol.

Thanks for doing this. Was definitely interesting. 

Did you change much of the story or just the characters names?

What was the right path to kill the wizard?

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3 hours ago, Nolder said:

Just the names. The human's name was Caric and the halfling was Laurus. I actually typed the names out the fist time and then I was like hmm if I change that to CTM and Spoot that might make it a little more personal and interesting and invest them in the story a little more. Nothing else was changed or altered.

 

The right path? Well I've never read the book before so idk let me see if I can find it real quick.

 

Ok here's how I did it. At the very first option I checked the hole instead of the leaves BUT that eventually led me to the baboon after a series of other encounters. It looks like the trick might have been to leave the baboon alone. From there I went through a series of tunnels and got the same ending you just got but when I backtracked one choice and went down another tunnel, an option I don't think you guys had in your adventure, I finally got a choice to face Kalman or flee. After choosing to face him I end up in the room Spoot/Laurus saw in his story at the beginning with "all the worlds treasure" but Kalman wasn't there. If you choose to search the room you find him and have a fight and kill him but all the treasure is locked behind a door. If you don't have the key Spoot/Laurus picks the lock and you get all the treasure and have a happy ending. If you do have the key you unlock the door and get all the treasure and have a happy ending. So I guess you didn't need to deal with the water weird as long as you beat Kalman lol. If you go back to the option of the room and instead of search for Kalman you just try to pick the lock right away Kalman ambushes you and you flee the dungeon safely before he can kill you. In the forest Spoot/Laurus reveals he stole two large diamonds and gives you one and you vow to use the money to fund another expedition into the dungeon to kill Kalman.

 

So I don't know if it's possible to get to Kalman if you encounter the baboon, it might be, but that was just how I did it.

So killing the ape prevented us from winning the game?

worth it :yes:

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