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Off Season Letters to Dr. Crush Love


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Dear Dr. @The Crusher

I recently asked an attractive co-worker if she wanted to go out sometime. We get along well at work and we both get a kick out of each other. She has not been dating and is on a break as she puts it, but she knows I am allot of fun and agreed to go out with me with the understanding it would be completely strictly as friends.

I am considering it, she is adorable and I enjoy her company, I think we would have a nice time and I am a good friend. Now there are allot of sure things out there, a literal smorgasbord of T&A, but I am a wholesome man, and that's not really what I want.

Can anything good come out of this?

I had nobody else to turn to, my penis is furious and he's not talking to me anymore.

Thanks for your help!

 

 

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20 minutes ago, joewilly12 said:

My God this guy is asking for dating advice on this forum that poor girl is someones daughter and loved one. 

Run I hope she quits her job and runs far away before she has to sign a restraining order. 

why you gotta be a hater? dude just wants some sweet, magical friend zone times

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12 hours ago, joewilly12 said:

My God this guy is asking for dating advice on this forum that poor girl is someones daughter and loved one. 

Run I hope she quits her job and runs far away before she has to sign a restraining order. 

@The Crusher  dont get involved. 

JW, I hope you know this thread is a bit.  Just some comedy.

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Dear @The Crusher

I stumbled onto this thread and I'm seriously considering electro-convulsive therapy to erase the memory of it.  It's been weighing on me for a few hours now, so my question is....do I pair a clean Pilsner with the meat lovers pizza or would a Belgian Wheat w/ a slice of orange be better?

Thanks in advance.

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7 hours ago, nycdan said:

Dear @The Crusher

I stumbled onto this thread and I'm seriously considering electro-convulsive therapy to erase the memory of it.  It's been weighing on me for a few hours now, so my question is....do I pair a clean Pilsner with the meat lovers pizza or would a Belgian Wheat w/ a slice of orange be better?

Thanks in advance.

Both. 

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8 hours ago, nycdan said:

Dear @The Crusher

I stumbled onto this thread and I'm seriously considering electro-convulsive therapy to erase the memory of it.  It's been weighing on me for a few hours now, so my question is....do I pair a clean Pilsner with the meat lovers pizza or would a Belgian Wheat w/ a slice of orange be better?

Thanks in advance.

Absolutely adore the buzz off ECT....literally.  Actually just purchased a home ECT kit I'm excited to try.  Assuming I have not fried my hippocampus, I'll let you know my results.

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31 minutes ago, munchmemory said:

Absolutely adore the buzz off ECT....literally.  Actually just purchased a home ECT kit I'm excited to try.  Assuming I have not fried my hippocampus, I'll let you know my results.

Maybe you already tried it and forgot.

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On 3/28/2021 at 10:16 AM, The Crusher said:

First thing you have to do is get a hand on your angry penis, this can be a very disruptive to everyday life, especially during the pandemic. Try  choking it till it vomits and finally falls to sleep. 

@joewilly12

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11 hours ago, nycdan said:

Dear @The Crusher

I stumbled onto this thread and I'm seriously considering electro-convulsive therapy to erase the memory of it.  It's been weighing on me for a few hours now, so my question is....do I pair a clean Pilsner with the meat lovers pizza or would a Belgian Wheat w/ a slice of orange be better?

Thanks in advance.

Start with one of these: https://awkwardessentials.com/

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17 hours ago, The Crusher said:

As long as it didn’t get injured  it’s a positive direction. 

Especially for those young men, injuries requiring stitching pose major, if not potentially catastrophic, problems.

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On 3/28/2021 at 11:16 AM, The Crusher said:

First thing you have to do is get a hand on your angry penis, this can be a very disruptive to everyday life, especially during the pandemic. Try  choking it till it vomits and finally falls to sleep. 

Update: She told me she is very fond of me today. Still just friends, but the penis is coming around, and is starting to believe there may be a light at the end of this tunnel.

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2 hours ago, BROOKLYN JET said:

Update: She told me she is very fond of me today. Still just friends, but the penis is coming around, and is starting to believe there may be a light at the end of this tunnel.

Did you show her your Porsche yet? 

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24 minutes ago, BROOKLYN JET said:

She's seen it, said she'd rather have a fabulous pair of boots.

That’s a good sign . When I met Mrs Crusher I had a Mercedes C36 AMG and after our first date I dropped her off and she apologized for not being impressed by my car. She just explained she  had no knowledge about cars but knew it was nice because people kept  mentioning it when we pulled up. Haha Two years  later we moved in together, combined our 4 kids, had another  on the way and I traded it in for a Suburban. 20 years later I’m happier than I’ve ever been, thank God and love her a little more everyday. 

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I dont appreciate the lack of respect for Dr. Crushlove in this thread.  The man is a genius.  

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5 minutes ago, JiF said:

I dont appreciate the lack of respect for Dr. Crushlove in this thread.  The man is a genius.  

I will never speak a negative word against the clinician who encouraged me to introduce various foodstuffs (cooked or otherwise) into the lovemaking rituals with my wife.  

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