Kids still live at home after age 25????

[Nolder]

13 minutes ago, Matt39 said:

National unemployment level is at its lowest ever. Those who want to work are right now.

Sure, when you change the definition of who counts as unemployed.

10 minutes ago, Untouchable said:

How do you pick up chicks when you have to take them back to mom and dads house and entice them into banging under the Iron Man covers?

You don't. That's why birth rates are down pretty much across the board except with immigrants.

[ZachEY]

15 minutes ago, Matt39 said:

I don’t see having to move as hopelessness. The northeast is crazy expensive. There are a ton of affordable areas in this country still. Nothing wrong with living with parents either if you want to stay local. 

I mean, that's not exactly what I was referring to as hopeless, but it's pretty sh*tty to have to leave your home if you don't want to, because you can't even afford an extremely modest home in the area, with an education and a decent job.

[ZachEY]

1 minute ago, Nolder said:

You don't. That's why birth rates are down pretty much across the board except with immigrants.

I thought it's because childcare costs more than most people make.

We joke that the 3rd kid is the most extravagant luxury flex a person can have.

[batman10023]

8 minutes ago, Matt39 said:

NYC is for rich people. The world has changed. Adapt and move and save up enough to move back or settle elsewhere. Resentment takes up too much energy.

Southpark was talking about living in queens after college.

NYC wasn't always for rich people.   many parts have becoming that way.

i have no resentment, sorry if it came out that way.    We live in a large luxury 3 bedroom with two kids in Manhattan and both my wife and i walk 5 minutes to work and have a weekend home in LI.  We have been very very fortunate, but that's not the case for most people.

 

[Nolder]

10 hours ago, southparkcpa said:

 

I spoke with both my daughters on this subject this week... both said they would not date a guy over 30 who lived at home.  Hold on, I  am shaking my cane as I write this.

 

The thing is, that's becoming more and more common so if they want something different that's obviously fine and good on them BUT they will have more competition for better men. The dating market is sort of mirroring the economic situation where the "top 1%" all kind of mingle together and then there's just everyone else.

[Matt39]

4 minutes ago, ZachEY said:

I mean, that's not exactly what I was referring to as hopeless, but it's pretty sh*tty to have to leave your home if you don't want to, because you can't even afford an extremely modest home in the area, with an education and a decent job.

This is in small areas of the country though. And with remote work being so prevalent now, it's easier than it used to be. NYC and the surrounding suburbs are super expensive, however still in high demand...so whose fault is it? 

[Matt39]

3 minutes ago, batman10023 said:

Southpark was talking about living in queens after college.

NYC wasn't always for rich people.   many parts have becoming that way.

i have no resentment, sorry if it came out that way.    We live in a large luxury 3 bedroom with two kids in Manhattan and both my wife and i walk 5 minutes to work and have a weekend home in LI.  We have been very very fortunate, but that's not the case for most people.

 

Sorry I meant Manhattan. But for 20 somethings having a roommate in Manhattan or multiple have always been a thing unless you have mom and dad helping out.

[Matt39]

8 minutes ago, Nolder said:

Sure, when you change the definition of who counts as unemployed.

Right, but those who want to work are right now. There are many, many open positions unfilled right now.

[batman10023]

2 minutes ago, ZachEY said:

I thought it's because childcare costs more than most people make.

We joke that the 3rd kid is the most extravagant luxury flex a person can have.

we just hired a afterschool babysitter and it's $30 an hour cash (under the table).   We are going to try to send our kids to private HS/MS next year.  It's $60k a year each after tax.  Summer camp costs more than a year's worth of what a year of college cost when i went.

Now, obviously there are ways to raise a kid cheaper but it's not easy.  Especially when you have student loans and sky high housing costs.

Unfortunately I don't have a solution.

 

[Matt39]

16 minutes ago, batman10023 said:

you realize there isn't a rubber plant anymore, many of the lower skill high paying jobs have moved overseas.

 

maybe i'm naive but when was this golden era of low skill/high paying jobs lol

[Matt39]

Just now, batman10023 said:

we just hired a afterschool babysitter and it's $30 an hour cash (under the table).   We are going to try to send our kids to private HS/MS next year.  It's $60k a year each after tax.  Summer camp costs more than a year's worth of what a year of college cost when i went.

Now, obviously there are ways to raise a kid cheaper but it's not easy.  Especially when you have student loans and sky high housing costs.

Unfortunately I don't have a solution.

 

bro this thread isnt for you lol

[batman10023]

7 minutes ago, Matt39 said:

maybe i'm naive but when was this golden era of low skill/high paying jobs lol

30 years ago.  jobs are overseas now or pay much less.

[Nolder]

9 minutes ago, ZachEY said:

I thought it's because childcare costs more than most people make.

We joke that the 3rd kid is the most extravagant luxury flex a person can have.

For sure. Definitely more than one factor.

3 minutes ago, Matt39 said:

Right, but those who want to work are right now. There are many, many open positions unfilled right now.

Yes and no. Many of those unfilled positions are things like janitor. People with psych degrees don't want to be a janitor and most of the time that job won't pay their bills anyway. Many cases like that. You also have many people who want to work but have given up searching. The Covid stimulus checks didn't help the situation either. I personally knew people who said they would make more money staying home than working so that's what they did. Unemployment is not as simple as "people don't want to work".

1 minute ago, Matt39 said:

maybe i'm naive but when was this golden era of low skill/high paying jobs lol

Generally speaking it's US manufacturing post WW2. All other manufacturing factories around the world were basically rubble and there was a labor shortage in the US. That era has been over for decades now.

[Matt39]

Just now, Nolder said:

For sure. Definitely more than one factor.

Yes and no. Many of those unfilled positions are things like janitor. People with psych degrees don't want to be a janitor and most of the time that job won't pay their bills anyway. Many cases like that. You also have many people who want to work but have given up searching. The Covid stimulus checks didn't help the situation either. I personally knew people who said they would make more money staying home than working so that's what they did. Unemployment is not as simple as "people don't want to work".

Generally speaking it's US manufacturing post WW2. All other manufacturing factories around the world were basically rubble and there was a labor shortage in the US. That era has been over for decades now.

A lot of good paying jobs at manufacturing plants still. Troubleshooters, machinists in particular. As far as unfilled jobs it goes beyond janitor. I see it first hand. 

[batman10023]

6 minutes ago, Matt39 said:

bro this thread isnt for you lol

lol, my kids have told us there is no way they are moving out.   so i am anticipating the situation several years down the road.

for the record my kids go to public school now so it doesn't cost us anything (outside of what we give to the PTA).  We only considering private school because it is a better fit and we can afford it.

[Matt39]

4 minutes ago, batman10023 said:

30 years ago.  jobs are overseas now or pay much less.

I wouldnt necessarily consider these jobs low skill. These jobs have changed but are still there. 

[batman10023]

4 minutes ago, Matt39 said:

A lot of good paying jobs at manufacturing plants still. Troubleshooters, machinists in particular. As far as unfilled jobs it goes beyond janitor. I see it first hand. 

88% of males in the 25-54 age bracket work.   Not as many slackers as boomers think.

[Matt39]

4 minutes ago, batman10023 said:

88% of males in the 25-54 age bracket work.   Not as many slackers as boomers think.

Yeah I wouldn't equate living at home to slacking. Boomers are closer to their kids than generations past when they finish high school or college Especially females (imo). Mom and daughter tend to be best friends a lot post college. Whether that's good or bad I dunno. My mother in law would have my wife and her sisters living their forever if she had her way, which seems weird to me. The WWII generation raised their kids and wanted them out at 18.

[batman10023]

3 minutes ago, Matt39 said:

I wouldnt necessarily consider these jobs low skill. These jobs have changed but are still there. 

the jobs you are describing aren't low skilled.

 

[batman10023]

1 minute ago, Matt39 said:

Yeah I wouldn't equate living at home to slacking. Boomers are closer to their kids than generations past. Especially females (imo). Mom and daughter tend to be best friends a lot post college.

agree on slacking point however, while you are saying its due to closeness of kids/parents, i think it's more economic related.

[Matt39]

2 minutes ago, batman10023 said:

the jobs you are describing aren't low skilled.

 

I dont think they were back then either though, just different. Working at a plant is different than Mcdonalds whether its 1975 or now.

[Matt39]

1 minute ago, batman10023 said:

agree on slacking point however, while you are saying its due to closeness of kids/parents, i think it's more economic related.

Sure! Which is why I think moving to other areas of the country should be on the table if kids want to move out. 

[ZachEY]

28 minutes ago, Matt39 said:

This is in small areas of the country though. And with remote work being so prevalent now, it's easier than it used to be. NYC and the surrounding suburbs are super expensive, however still in high demand...so whose fault is it? 

Check out the article I posted earlier.  It's not in small areas of the country.  The average salary doesn't pay for the average lifestyle now.

[Matt39]

4 minutes ago, ZachEY said:

Check out the article I posted earlier.  It's not in small areas of the country.  The average salary doesn't pay for the average lifestyle now.

Wages have not kept up I agree there. I also think social media has obscured real life and what a regular life actually is. Many people living off of credit cards to keep up with the joneses.

[southparkcpa]

13 hours ago, batman10023 said:

Southpark was talking about living in queens after college.

NYC wasn't always for rich people.   many parts have becoming that way.

i have no resentment, sorry if it came out that way.    We live in a large luxury 3 bedroom with two kids in Manhattan and both my wife and i walk 5 minutes to work and have a weekend home in LI.  We have been very very fortunate, but that's not the case for most people.

 

I lived in a 1 BR in Rosedale Queens for $600 a month when my annual salary was $17,800.  Do the math, I couldn't afford it.

Basically 50 percent of my take home pay went to my rent. I then had subway to the office, etc.  

I was sort of disillusioned as many of these young kids seem now. BUT, my mom told me "NO".  No man lives in my house a year after college.

I got a second job cleaning offices 4 nights a week for a while.

Best thing I ever did.  

 

 

 

[southparkcpa]

1 hour ago, batman10023 said:

the data just doesn't back up your statement about nobody from 30-35 wants to work.

in terms of what boomers did - shipped a lot of jobs overseas for one.  second, ran a massive federal deficit to subsidize lavish (on a national level) living above their means.

go try paying for school or a house today compared to what you went thru.  night and day.

(i am a gen x)

So I just turned 60. CPA/CFP with a very nice practice. I moved to NC in 1995 with 8K in the bank and no job.  In my business, most my clients can't find help.  Ads on radio are for help now, trucking, insurance etc.  EVERY company is looking to hire. When I say do not want to work, I mis spoke. I am stating what I hear my clients saying.. I work now with MANY young kids aspiring to be CFP's or already are CFP's by age 25. When they are 30... they will be making 125K.  So it's out there if you want to chase it.

[BeaconJet]

25+ years ago, right after college, I split a $1500/month apartment in Brooklyn, that was realistically a 2 BR, with 2 roommates, and still couldn't afford it, but I scraped by, paid off my college loans, and somehow, eventually, managed to be debt free after a few years. It sucked, but it was a growth experience for sure.

That said, I dont envy young people today. Its even tougher for them.

[ZachEY]

5 minutes ago, Matt39 said:

Wages have not kept up I agree there. I also think social media has obscured real life and what a regular life actually is. Many people living off of credit cards to keep up with the joneses.

The article doesn't even consider superfluous spending.  Just housing, education, transportation, and healthcare.

[ZachEY]

38 minutes ago, batman10023 said:

we just hired a afterschool babysitter and it's $30 an hour cash (under the table).   We are going to try to send our kids to private HS/MS next year.  It's $60k a year each after tax.  Summer camp costs more than a year's worth of what a year of college cost when i went.

Now, obviously there are ways to raise a kid cheaper but it's not easy.  Especially when you have student loans and sky high housing costs.

Unfortunately I don't have a solution.

 

I went for the 30K property tax bill to avoid private school tuition and we get after school care from the grandparents, fortunately.

I think we may have talked about camp once before?  Over 10K now for day camp.

[southparkcpa]

1 hour ago, batman10023 said:

it's not how you were raised.  it's that your parents generation didn't raise costs on everything

tell me how someone making $70k a year with student loans can afford to live on their own in nyc now?   it's not possible.

 

I respect your point.......   My daughter moved to DC on a 35K salary in 2012.  TONS of her friends moved to Manhattan on 50K salaries.  They got roommates and lived 3-4 to an apartment.  It gets done.....  This thread has taken a life of it's own. I see most points of view. For me...  getting out of the house, getting started ion a career, not having a safety net made all the difference.  BUT... after 10 years of college, I was broke.  Moved to NC, now I am not broke.

 

[Matt39]

8 minutes ago, ZachEY said:

I went for the 30K property tax bill to avoid private school tuition and we get after school care from the grandparents, fortunately.

I think we may have talked about camp once before?  Over 10K now for day camp.

If you can afford it then that’s awesome. I’m sensing a disconnect here though. There are plenty of places that don’t carry a 30k property tax bill. But if you want higher paid teachers, smaller districts and pensions that were never sustainable that comes with the territory I guess. 10k a year for day camp is preposterous though lol

[batman10023]

6 minutes ago, ZachEY said:

I went for the 30K property tax bill to avoid private school tuition and we get after school care from the grandparents, fortunately.

I think we may have talked about camp once before?  Over 10K now for day camp.

Yep 10k a kid. 6 weeks.  It’s very nice but overpriced.  My wife’s decision. 
 

my kids got into g&t and so we stuck around.  Plus grandparents still worked at the time. 

[batman10023]

8 minutes ago, southparkcpa said:

I respect your point.......   My daughter moved to DC on a 35K salary in 2012.  TONS of her friends moved to Manhattan on 50K salaries.  They got roommates and lived 3-4 to an apartment.  It gets done.....  This thread has taken a life of it's own. I see most points of view. For me...  getting out of the house, getting started ion a career, not having a safety net made all the difference.  BUT... after 10 years of college, I was broke.  Moved to NC, now I am not broke.

 

I moved to nyc after high school and have stayed ever since.  I am more like you.  I just see the younger folks point of view. 

[Larz]

1 hour ago, batman10023 said:

nurses should be able to afford living in CT.  that is surprising.

She’s a new grad and I think once her savings is built up she could do it.  She’s also very cheap lol

[Matt39]

3 minutes ago, batman10023 said:

Yep 10k a kid. 6 weeks.  It’s very nice but overpriced.  My wife’s decision. 
 

my kids got into g&t and so we stuck around.  Plus grandparents still worked at the time. 

60k for middle school then your babysitter should be getting that paper!!