Jets announce Try-Outs for Franchise QB …

[OtherwiseHappyinLife]

Florham Park:  After years of failed first & second round picks and a 1 year trial & error with an aging & perverted Brett Favre (who somehow found the fountain of youth a year after sending an old man dick pic to a Jets sideline reporter), the Jets have decided to go a different route.

Gang Green has officially lowered its expectations for their next franchise QB and are  hosting fan tryouts to improve the play under center.

Here’s what they are looking for:

1. Age 20-50

2. Experience in the quick passing game.  Yes, 2 hand touch and flag football will count 

3. A ‘Release’ time of under 5 seconds (many here would qualify)

4. Inability to audible.  This is a MUST HAVE

5. An extreme level of adrenaline sufficient to run away from angry grown men intent on hurting you

6. The ability to throw the following passes with accuracy

    - 5 yard slant

    - 2 yard screen 

     - 3 yard curl

     - 17 yard go route

7.  Ribs that can withstand extreme force (minimum 250 pound mass accelerating at 17 MPH)

8. A little bit of passion (uh-hum Joe Flacco)

9. A little hair on top, important for marketing shots 

10. The ability to pretend to look one way while quickly throwing another way

11. Decent enough throwing mechanics, defined as your feet generally pointing in the direction of the throw (we’ll accept a tolerance of 50 rotational degrees)

If interested, contact the Jets at 1.800.blue14

 

[PositiveJet]

Is willie beamen available 

[OtherwiseHappyinLife]

11 minutes ago, PositiveJet said:

Is willie beamen available 

By the way, who is willie beamen?  Lol

[Jet hustle]

3 hours ago, OtherwiseHappyinLife said:

By the way, who is willie beamen?  Lol

Are you serious man?......