The Last Bastion Of In-Flight Insanity Kept Off Of Airplanes

[The Gun Of Bavaria]

Mark my words, if they ever allow in-flight cell phone use, the % of air rage cases increases ten fold. Cell phones inside a cramped aircraft would be a recipie for disaster.

WASHINGTON - Striking a blow for cell phone haters everywhere, a government agency on Tuesday said it will keep a rule in place that requires the divisive devices to be turned off during airline flights.

The reasoning behind the decision was technical. But the avalanche of comments the Federal Communications Commission has logged from airline travelers have been nothing short of visceral.

[PFSIKH]

Mark my words, if they ever allow in-flight cell phone use, the % of air rage cases increases ten fold. Cell phones inside a cramped aircraft would be a recipie for disaster.

I just want to be able to use my PSP and IPOD in the first ten minutes of a flight.

I heard a comedian yesterday saying he is not going to take planes anymore. He said, due to the shoe bomber we have to take of our shoes. Due to the threat of liquids being a hazard, we are limited to the amount we can take on the plane. The next logical step is for some person to smuggle a device in their ass. From which the FAA will start full cavity searches.

[oktaren]

i hate cell phones, and just phones in general, so im happy about it. although i rarely fly...

[The Gun Of Bavaria]

I just want to be able to use my PSP and IPOD in the first ten minutes of a flight.

I heard a comedian yesterday saying he is not going to take planes anymore. He said, due to the shoe bomber we have to take of our shoes. Due to the threat of liquids being a hazard, we are limited to the amount we can take on the plane. The next logical step is for some person to smuggle a device in their ass. From which the FAA will start full cavity searches.

Agreed. They need to change that. Specially the iPod because it allows you to tune out the arseholes right away. I don't know how people fly every week or two for buisness w/o killing someone, I really don't. Flying has become a high priced Greyhound Bus that goes faster and costs 5 times as much.

[SlugORama99]

Agreed. They need to change that. Specially the iPod because it allows you to tune out the arseholes right away. I don't know how people fly every week or two for buisness w/o killing someone, I really don't. Flying has become a high priced Greyhound Bus that goes faster and costs 5 times as much.

It really is a joke. Even if people are paying attention to the "things to do if there is an emergency" crap, do you really think anyone will follow instructions if something bad happens. It would be every man for himself and absolute craziness. I can't stand loud cell phone talkers walking down the street, can you imagine something like that on a plane? Holy S.

[Green DNA]

Agreed. They need to change that. Specially the iPod because it allows you to tune out the arseholes right away. I don't know how people fly every week or two for buisness w/o killing someone, I really don't. Flying has become a high priced Greyhound Bus that goes faster and costs 5 times as much.

I fly all the time on business. The first thing you realize is that a lot of people are ignorant, inconsiderate, self centered, self absorbed a$$holes. The amount of yapping on the phone that goes on prior to everyone being told to turn off their phones is mind boggling. Everyone wants to sound like an all important big shot. If they allow cell phone use during a flight I can eventually envision the FBI waiting for me at the gate and then leading me off the plane in handcuffs.

[SlugORama99]

I fly all the time on business. The first thing you realize is that a lot of people are ignorant, inconsiderate, self centered, self absorbed a$$holes. The amount of yapping on the phone that goes on prior to everyone being told to turn off their phones is mind boggling. Everyone wants to sound like an all important big shot. If they allow cell phone use during a flight I can eventually envision the FBI waiting for me at the gate and then leading me off the plane in handcuffs.

I couldn't agree more. There would also need to be a medical extraction team waiting as well!

[JerryK]

I fly all the time on business. The first thing you realize is that a lot of people are ignorant, inconsiderate, self centered, self absorbed a$$holes. The amount of yapping on the phone that goes on prior to everyone being told to turn off their phones is mind boggling. Everyone wants to sound like an all important big shot. If they allow cell phone use during a flight I can eventually envision the FBI waiting for me at the gate and then leading me off the plane in handcuffs.

You know, I agree but take it 1 controversial step further. When I travel on business I carry my laptop, but I CHECK MY #@$% SUITCASE.

I'm sick of people so desperately afraid their underpants will vanish that they have to tie up the flight hauling the stupid thing on board.

[CrazyCarl40]

Now if we can only get them to ban in flight movies starring Tim Allen.

[faba]

On the ferry I take people are talking on the cell phone the whole trip- so annoying when you are trying to read and or rest. Like all I want to hear is what they are having for dinner.

[johnny green balls]

I just want to be able to use my PSP and IPOD in the first ten minutes of a flight.

I heard a comedian yesterday saying he is not going to take planes anymore. He said, due to the shoe bomber we have to take of our shoes. Due to the threat of liquids being a hazard, we are limited to the amount we can take on the plane. The next logical step is for some person to smuggle a device in their ass. From which the FAA will start full cavity searches.

no wonder the JN mods' "retreat" consists of flying to a far-off airport, walking outside the airport for 5 minutes of fresh air, and then immediately walking in to go back through security and fly back home.

[Panzer Division Marduk]

Flying has become a high priced Greyhound Bus that goes faster and costs 5 times as much.

Past year and a half, I've been flying Ryanair (as anyone based in Europe will know, not the most passenger friendly of airlines) every couple of weeks. They have announced that, next year, they plan on allowing people to use their mobiles on flights.

Thank Creative for the Zen.

[NJ]

You know, I agree but take it 1 controversial step further. When I travel on business I carry my laptop, but I CHECK MY #@$% SUITCASE.

I'm sick of people so desperately afraid their underpants will vanish that they have to tie up the flight hauling the stupid thing on board.

I don't Jerry. I'm not on planes as much with the new biz, but when I was hitting a couple different destinations every week - I always carry on. I've got 2 different wheel cases, a smaller one for 2 days or less and another for 2 days +. Both fit within all airlines dimensional restrictions and it's then only a game if you're one of the last to board and the overheads are full. Only thing I'll ever check is my clubs. There's not only hours to be saved while waiting at the baggage turnstile but I've had too many instances of them losing stuff. The wait through security isn't any different as they still have to check my briefcase/laptop anyway. I don't care how long I'm going for - if it don't fit in the bigger case or my briefcase - it ain't going.

Right on Craig - I'll be with you in Rikers or where ever if they let the self serving public yak on cell phones during a flight - I'll be cuffed and in the sh!tcan real quick. It's one of the few times I can have un-interrupted peace to get work done or just read If I feel like it.

[oktaren]

i hate anyone who brings a single piece of luggage onto the plane, check the damn thing, i don't want you fumbling around with the damn bag.

line em up...

[NJ]

i hate anyone who brings a single piece of luggage onto the plane, check the damn thing, i don't want you fumbling around with the damn bag.

line em up...

Good. Hate on. Hate real good while you're playing pocket pool waiting for your backpack and pilowcase to come off the turnstyle.

[oktaren]

Good. Hate on. Hate real good while you're playing pocket pool waiting for your backpack and pilowcase to come off the turnstyle.

i don't usually take luggage with me when im flying, but if i was i would be courteous enough to check it.

always gotta hate the fat stupid and slow.

[NJ]

i don't usually take luggage with me when im flying, but if i was i would be courteous enough to check it.

What? You have it shipped UPS or you just don't have anything to bring? People that know what they're doing don't hold anybody up with carry-on luggage. You're not on that list so please continue to operate as you do.

[oktaren]

What? You have it shipped UPS or you just don't have anything to bring? People that know what they're doing don't hold anybody up with carry-on luggage. You're not on that list so please continue to operate as you do.

i never said i can't do it, i said courteous people don't, but you wouldn't know anything about that. 99% of the people are either fat, slow or stupid, and the other 1% don't take planes very often.

i don't really need to bring much with me when i go places. im not a consumer whore.

[Green DNA]

i don't really need to bring much with me when i go places. im not a consumer whore.

Don't you start to get a little funky after a while? There's nothing wrong with a change of clothes.

[JerryK]

Plenty of the consultants I work with carry on...Its just one of the few things that bug me, that's all.

That and "North Face" coats.

And spongy toilet seats.

[oktaren]

Don't you start to get a little funky after a while? There's nothing wrong with a change of clothes.

no, i keep myself clean. its not hard.

i can fit more than one change of clothes in a pretty small over the shoulder bag, along with pretty much everything else i would need to bring on any trip. i only wear about 3 different outfits as it is now...

[The Gun Of Bavaria]

I agree with you DNA et. al, the Air Marshalls would have to increase their manning by 500% to deal with the new cases midair. 75% of people on cells are arseholes, whether it be driving, flying or sitting in a restaurant. Today alone I take my daughter to BK so she can play on the indoor playground and while she's eating lunch, some bitch is absolutely screaming on her cell phone. I lost it and told her if I wanted to listen to her conversation I'd tap her line, but I don't, so shut the hell up.

Movie Theatres, you name it, have been ruined by those damn things. Apparently before them NOTHING ever got done in this country. Apparently w/o them the world would just collapse and everyone would be dead.

You wait...it's only a matter of time before the 'cell phone lobby' puts some money in someones pocket and these things get allowed on aircraft. When that happens, I'm bringing a machete on board to cut the arms off of those idiots who use em. LOL

[ECURB]

I wont fly as it is... this just adds to my reasons..

[Verde]

I fly all the time on business. The first thing you realize is that a lot of people are ignorant, inconsiderate, self centered, self absorbed a$$holes.

Everyone wants to sound like an all important big shot.

You need not fly to realize this.

[The Gun Of Bavaria]

You need not fly to realize this.

Add dinner to that location list.

[ECURB]

Add dinner to that location list.

Add my store to that list...

I will be on the phone with a customer... and someones cell will ring (louder than would ever be needed) and then they will talk (louder than would ever be needed)....

[The Gun Of Bavaria]

Add my store to that list...

I will be on the phone with a customer... and someones cell will ring (louder than would ever be needed) and then they will talk (louder than would ever be needed)....

That's when you throw their arse out of the store.

[Boozer76]

In these situations I do one of 2 things. I either literally start joining in on the conversation, such as:

Rude Cell user "are we having Chicken for dinner??!!"

Me(abruptly interrupting rude caller and asking): "oh my god I just love chicken, have you ever had Chicken Kiev, it's to die for!! Seriously!! Or even Chicken with Penne ala Vodka! Yeah, you just add vodka to tomato sauce and cream, pour it over penne and mix your sliced grilled chicken! It's so delicious!!"

At this point people will give you a very uneasy smile and then either hang up or hover away from you and whisper. If I'm not feeling spunky enough to do that then I literally pretend like I'm talking on my cell phone and just start mirroring thei conversation loud enough so they hear me. For example:

Rude cell user- "are we having chicken for dinner?"

Me (acting as if I just placed a call-"Hi honey, yeah I just though Chicken might be a great idea for donner!"

Rude caller-"hmmm, maybe we can go out to eat toni..."

Me almost nterruptively-"You know hon', maybe we should go out instead!"

Etc........

The caller will look at you in bewilderment wondering if you are actually mimicking them or just so coincidentally having the same conversation with someone else. Either way they will either hang up or turn away and talk lower. Try either one, they work!!

[The Gun Of Bavaria]

In these situations I do one of 2 things. I either literally start joining in on the conversation, such as:

Rude Cell user "are we having Chicken for dinner??!!"

Me(abruptly interrupting rude caller and asking): "oh my god I just love chicken, have you ever had Chicken Kiev, it's to die for!! Seriously!! Or even Chicken with Penne ala Vodka! Yeah, you just add vodka to tomato sauce and cream, pour it over penne and mix your sliced grilled chicken! It's so delicious!!"

At this point people will give you a very uneasy smile and then either hang up or hover away from you and whisper. If I'm not feeling spunky enough to do that then I literally pretend like I'm talking on my cell phone and just start mirroring thei conversation loud enough so they hear me. For example:

Rude cell user- "are we having chicken for dinner?"

Me (acting as if I just placed a call-"Hi honey, yeah I just though Chicken might be a great idea for donner!"

Rude caller-"hmmm, maybe we can go out to eat toni..."

Me almost nterruptively-"You know hon', maybe we should go out instead!"

Etc........

The caller will look at you in bewilderment wondering if you are actually mimicking them or just so coincidentally having the same conversation with someone else. Either way they will either hang up or turn away and talk lower. Try either one, they work!!

I love that. It's amazing ,.,people talk in their cells like they're using 2 cans connected by waxed string