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Fishooked

The "Unofficial" JetNation Funny Pic Thread

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Why some, supposed cognoscenti, question your skill and vision in the sphere of visual arts has always been--and will continue to be--a source of deep personal bafflement. As for the anticipated images: I envision JB as the fecund Earth Mother--possibly, Anu, the Irish goddess of the earth and fertility--in an epic battle of cultures and religious icons with Benzaiten, the Japanese goddess of love, ideally personified by Maria Ozawa, shown below. Let me know your thoughts ASAP as I've take the liberty of putting a "hold" on a small, yet fully-equipt, studio.

16806gi1.jpg

No, let's move forward right away. Just the surging number of nostril fetishists alone will guarantee us a sizable audience. I eagerly await instructions for next steps.

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No, let's move forward right away. Just the surging number of nostril fetishists alone will guarantee us a sizable audience. I eagerly await instructions for next steps.

You could stick some cute toes up JB's nostrils and kill 2 birds with 1 stone. Nostril fettishes and toe fettishes. Personally I'm a boob guy, but hey, to each his own.

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No, let's move forward right away. Just the surging number of nostril fetishists alone will guarantee us a sizable audience. I eagerly await instructions for next steps.

If memory serves me right, these individuals prefer narisists. Also, they tend to regard "fetishist" as a term of disparagement, as they view the naris--the mot juste to the more commonly used, nostril--as just another orifice in which to "off-load" their vital man essence. Though many would gladly cast the first stone, as it were, against these individuals for their divergent sexual practices, who are we to judge, after all?

As for our shoot: I'm thinking that we could possibly get some mileage out of JB's historic, and gut wrenching, leaving of JetsInsider. Nothing in stone, but what if we had JB as the personification of JetNation battling Japanese female grappler, Chikako Shiratori (shown in an image below), as the embodiment of JetsInsider? We could go with hackneyed wrestling gear, or the swimsuit or lingerie route, but I'm thinking they are roads too well traveled for our sophisticated audience. Maybe we go "old school" Greco-Roman style, with each combatant nude save for tastefully applied body paints? Get back to me, please.

chikakoshiratori25ntch4.jpg

Edited by Borgoguy

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If memory serves me right, these individuals prefer narisists. Also, they tend to regard "fetishist" as a term of disparagement, as they view the naris--the mot juste to the more commonly used, nostril--as just another orifice in which to "off-load" their vital man essence. Though many would gladly cast the first stone, as it were, against these individuals for their divergent sexual practices, who are we to judge, after all?

As for our shoot: I'm thinking that we could possibly get some mileage out of JB's historic, and gut wrenching, leaving of JetsInsider. Nothing in stone, but what if we had JB as the personification of JetNation battling Japanese female grappler, Chikako Shiratori (shown in an image below), as the embodiment of JetsInsider? We could go with hackneyed wrestling gear, or the swimsuit or lingerie route, but I'm thinking they are roads too well traveled for our sophisticated audience. Maybe we go "old school" Greco-Roman style, with each combatant nude save for tastefully applied body paints? Get back to me, please.

chikakoshiratori25ntch4.jpg

you seem like you really thought this out.

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You could stick some cute toes up JB's nostrils and kill 2 birds with 1 stone. Nostril fettishes and toe fettishes. Personally I'm a boob guy, but hey, to each his own.

That's actually pretty good thinking, you know, for a Phins fan.

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you seem like you really thought this out.

LOL. Not really. It's just some stupid riff that popped into my head seeing the other related posts pertaining to your newest image. I could spend 23 hours a day writing humor pieces in the voice of the "agent" or "movie executive", especially when I have the inspired lunacy of Norway involved in the comedic alchemy. (Since I'm only human, I need one hour for Asian porn perusal.) I hope you know that none of my insanity is ever meant in a mean spirited way, and not really directed to you as Erica, but to the "character" of JetsBabe as she appears here on JetsNation. Just as the "character" of Borgoguy, who is miles from my actual persona. :)

Edited by Borgoguy

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If memory serves me right, these individuals prefer narisists. Also, they tend to regard "fetishist" as a term of disparagement, as they view the naris--the mot juste to the more commonly used, nostril--as just another orifice in which to "off-load" their vital man essence. Though many would gladly cast the first stone, as it were, against these individuals for their divergent sexual practices, who are we to judge, after all?

As for our shoot: I'm thinking that we could possibly get some mileage out of JB's historic, and gut wrenching, leaving of JetsInsider. Nothing in stone, but what if we had JB as the personification of JetNation battling Japanese female grappler, Chikako Shiratori (shown in an image below), as the embodiment of JetsInsider? We could go with hackneyed wrestling gear, or the swimsuit or lingerie route, but I'm thinking they are roads too well traveled for our sophisticated audience. Maybe we go "old school" Greco-Roman style, with each combatant nude save for tastefully applied body paints? Get back to me, please.

That's perfect! You sir, are genius. I would like this to take place in large vat of spinach. What do you think?

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That's perfect! You sir, are genius. I would like this to take place in large vat of spinach. What do you think?

Off the bat, chills. No, shudders and pangs of anticipation. Though, if we hope to attract, and tap into, the Orient-driven market, we may be wise to employ Goma-ae, which is boiled spinach with sesame dressing. Failing this--as there is a global shortage of acceptable (non-visibly wilted) spinach, what are your feelings about using Kinpira-gobo, (simmered burdock root) or Namasu (daikon and carrot salad)?

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LOL. Not really. It's just some stupid riff that popped into my head seeing the other related posts pertaining to your newest image. I could spend 23 hours a day writing humor pieces in the voice of the "agent" or "movie executive", especially when I have the inspired lunacy of Norway involved in the comedic alchemy. (Since I'm only human, I need one hour for Asian porn perusal.) I hope you know that none of my insanity is ever meant in a mean spirited way, and not really directed to you as Erica, but to the "character" of JetsBabe as she appears here on JetsNation. Just as the "character" of Borgoguy, who is miles from my actual persona. :)

oh, borgo...you're one of the only people that understand that jets babe is just a character. erika is a nerd trapped in jets babe's body.

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The best gif from the best SuperBowl commercial this year (careerbuilder.com)

Plus its how I feel Mon-Wed

2dnt4y.gif

Edit: Dammit, 2000 posts.....hell in that case.......

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Edited by Fishooked
  • Upvote 2

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The best gif from the best SuperBowl commercial this year (careerbuilder.com)

Plus its how I feel Mon-Wed

2dnt4y.gif

Edit: Dammit, 2000 posts.....hell in that case.......

2dnt4y.gif

2dnt4y.gif

2dnt4y.gif

2dnt4y.gif

2dnt4y.gif

2dnt4y.gif

2dnt4y.gif

2dnt4y.gif

LOL Yo can you add PWNED on that? This would be an effective gif on the board when someone gets destroyed.

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LOL Yo can you add PWNED on that? This would be an effective gif on the board when someone gets destroyed.

This was the best I could do with my boss lurking about...

33msmee.gif

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Got this by e-mail

I am better than your kids.

If you work in an office with lots of people, chances are that you work with a person who hangs pictures up that their kids have drawn. The pictures are always of some stupid flower or a tree with wheels. These pictures suck; I could draw pictures much better. In fact, I can spell, do math and run faster than your kids. So being that my skills are obviously superior to those of children, I've taken the liberty to judge art work done by other kids on the internet. I'll be assigning a grade A through F for each piece:

crapart5.jpg Megan, age 4 First of all, I don't even know what this is. If it's supposed to be a dog, then it's the ****tiest dog I've ever seen. F

crapart4.jpg Kyle, age 8 You spelled America wrong *******. Also, I could have sworn America's colors were red, white and blue. There's no yellow anywhere, traitor.F

crapart3.jpg Lisa, age 6 Holy ****, I almost had a seizure when I saw this one. Three words: too many colors. Also, eggs aren't supposed to have ears, dip****.F

crapart2.jpg Cameron, age 4 Terrible. F

crapart1.jpg Bryce, age 10 This one wouldn't be too bad if the color were kept inside the lines, you picked a new perspective, used non-abrasive colors and asked someone with talent to paint it for you. On one hand I want to give an A for effort but...

crapart2_4.jpg Jon, age 8 Ding Ding! Here comes the ****-mobile. I've never seen a fire truck that needed to be shaved. I would rather be burned to death than be saved by this hairy piece of ****. F

crapart2_2.jpg Rachel, age 7 That's interesting, everyone in this picture is white. Even the rainbow is white. Perhaps in an ideal world, everyone would be white isn't that right, Rachel? Or should I call you RACIST? Nice try, Hitler. F

crapart2_3.jpg Jason, age 6 This one would receive an "A" if the assignment was to throw as much random **** onto a paper as poorly as you can. I've pissed patterns on snow that look more coherent than this. F

crapart2_5.jpg Seth, age 4 Vrrrroooooooooooommmmmm! F

crapart2_1.jpg Kelly, age 9 This was a Christmas gift from Kelly to her parents. Good job Kelly, now pack up your **** and find a foster home. If my kids tried to pass this off as a gift, they'd come home from school and find all their **** outside in a box. What a lousy gift, seriously. You give them video games and toys, and they give you some half-assed drawing with a crooked tree. I wonder how much a gift like this would set someone back. Five, maybe ten minutes to find a napkin and some markers? F

I can't believe how much I rule.

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The McPizza

Once again, Nuclear Toast Laboratories returns with a new cooksperiment. I can't take credit for the idea, since I saw it on the intartubes, but that didn't stop me from investigating this concept and bringing you the hard-hitting, gritty truth.

I love pizza. So any opportunity to try a new type of pizza is always welcome. And since this one doesn't seem to have any name, I've dubbed it "McPizza".

First, we need some ingredients. Boboli (whole wheat, of course), sauce, cheese, and... what? Mickey D's?

mcpizza01.jpg

The contents of the McD's bag: two cheeseburgers, medium fries, 4-piece chicken McNuggets. And, inexplicably, a straw.

mcpizza02.jpg

Start with the Boboli crust.

mcpizza03.jpg

Add sauce, top with oregano.

mcpizza04.jpg

Add the key McToppings.

mcpizza06.jpg

Layer on the cheese.

mcpizza07.jpg

Close-up of some key ingredients.

mcpizza08.jpg

Bake at 450 for about 15 minutes until the cheese starts getting crunchy around the edges. Here's the McPizza fresh out of the oven.

mcpizza09.jpg

I used a pizza cutter to slice up all the McGoodness.

mcpizza10.jpg

Round-robin bite-taking to distribute the delicious taste sensations. Hamburger-y fry-y chicken-y pizza!

mcpizza11.jpg

To answer everyone's first question, it tastes exactly like you'd expect. Hamburger+pizza or french fries+pizza or chicken nugglets+pizza. That being said, this is one of the most awesome pizzas I've ever had, and believe me, I've put away my fair share. The pickles in the cheeseburger are a nice touch; the fries are just amazing this way, and the chicken McNuggets are surprisingly delicious. Maybe it's just the jalapenos.

The lab notes section:

This thing is really filling. Extremely filling. So a smaller pizza than you're used to will feed the normal crowd.

Smush the cheeseburgers in the wrapper before you put them on the pizza, so they're not as vertical.

I had to arrange the fries to get good coverage without a lot of holes or parts hanging over the edge.

Eating was a challenge, as the cheese helped make the toppings a layer that wanted to separate from the sauce/crust combination below. So taking a bite would cause the whole topping layer to rise up, pivoting at the bite point, and smack you in the nose. This is a sloppy-eating pizza.

Reheating was easy. One minute in the microwave, then about 8 minutes in the oven to restore the crispness.

Would I make the McPizza again? Oh HELL yes.

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