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Confessions of an Uppity Bitch.... My Story


ZachEY
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Hello JetNation, my name is EY and I am an Uppity Bitch.

Feel free to address me as such as it is the cross I bear.

When expunged from the woom that was JI, I found myself in this new land. I knew I still possessed the skills to be the message board sensation that I was on that site. I knew I could put to use these skills developed in old country to make a success of myself here.

However, I have come to find that it is in fact lonely at the top, and while I still maintain my uppity bitchiness I've begun to feel different about it. A level of dissonance on the horizon, if you will.

I'd like to say that I am working out my issues, but it is indeed true... I do believe I am better than most of you. However, I have been making progress and there are currently 6 JetNation Posters who I do not feel that I am superior to.

Below is my list, with explanations.

1) Max - I'm playing in his playground, so clearly he is the greater. I'm hoping to start EYNation to eliminate him from this list, as it is embarrassing to have a man of such girth be my superior.

2) gg - A guiding light and moral compass, she's the jewish mother I ascribe to be someday.

3) Irish Jet - He beat me in the JetNation Single Elimination Bracket Challenge, so clearly he is better than me. Also, he's posting from Ireland, which until my arrival at JetNation, I was under the impression did not have the internet.

4) Doggin94it - He simply opperates on another level than the rest of us. Accomplishes in 6 days what most of us can only hope to do in 7.

5) Boroguy - He's just like me, only better. Similar temperment, similar sense of humor, similar I don't have a third but when written it looks better. He does have the age experience so perhaps I can chalk it up to that.

6) Sperm Edwards - His knowledge of both football and homosexuality far surpasses mine. I study him.

So there you have it. 6 Posters on JN who are better than me. If you feel that you were somehow left off this list, feel free to let me know about it, and I will explain to you why it was not in oversight via Hiaku.

Thank you for reading, my inferiors.

*Please accept my apologies if you thought this was going to be a review for the Disney/Pixar film: Up

Up325.jpg

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Thats a hell of an intro to coming out of the closet. Good for you EY. Good for you.

Even though this is in part an insult, I look at the positive side. It's what helps keep me up(pity).

Hey, look at that, you can't spell uppity without pity, which is exactly what I feel for many who are not on my list.

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For the record, I am the ONLY one authorized to post in giant, size 7, red lettered fonts.

Thanks.

Umm.. About that. It seems there was a clerical error and you did not send the paperwork in in triplicate so your authorization has been revoked pending interdepartmental review.

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Hi Boopsie. Im not going to start but how you didn't make the list is beyond me. After all your JiF he is not.

Thank you muffin top.

He is definitely not the JiF. I was the first to go to the initials of my user name...all these other chumps followed, EY, CTM, JMJ, GOB, SMC. All the initial users on Jets message board followed my lead.

What does this have to do with EY's thread?

Not a damn thing.

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