Max'sDroid Posted April 6, 2010 Share Posted April 6, 2010 Someone help. Ever since he's discovered my voice recognition capabilities i've been getting bathed in his warm bologna breath nearly all day. At first it was a relief from spending all day in his soggy back pocket with the ever present reminder of his deficient butt wiping capabilities, but you try faithfully recording the constant musings of a dull, dimwitted troglodyte for more then 1 hour and tell me you wouldn't be wishing you were an iPhone. I'll pay handsomely if someone can knock me out of his paw with enough force to crack me open the next time you see him. Pm for details Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aten Posted April 6, 2010 Share Posted April 6, 2010 Someone help. Ever since he's discovered my voice recognition capabilities i've been getting bathed in his warm bologna breath nearly all day. At first it was a relief from spending all day in his soggy back pocket with the ever present reminder of his deficient butt wiping capabilities, but you try faithfully recording the constant musings of a dull, dimwitted troglodyte for more then 1 hour and tell me you wouldn't be wishing you were an iPhone. I'll pay handsomely if someone can knock me out of his paw with enough force to crack me open the next time you see him. Pm for details Homophone. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Max'sDroid Posted April 6, 2010 Author Share Posted April 6, 2010 Homophone. Interestingly enough that was the first app Max installed on me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Verde Posted April 6, 2010 Share Posted April 6, 2010 I'm impressed that it recognized the proper context/spelling of the word "butt". Good job Droid, but Max still sucks, even though he knows big words like troglodyte. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maxman Posted April 7, 2010 Share Posted April 7, 2010 I'm impressed that it recognized the proper context/spelling of the word "butt". Good job Droid, but Max still sucks, even though he knows big words like troglodyte. I would have used a$$. I don't know big words. Looking up the user now. Pretty funny though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Max'sDroid Posted April 7, 2010 Author Share Posted April 7, 2010 He's been blubbering all morning about how bad he feels for "America's Sweetheart" Sandra Bullock. He does this in between searching google video for "watch sandra bullock sex tape dirty sanchez" Somebody kill me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dan. Posted April 7, 2010 Share Posted April 7, 2010 He's been blubbering all morning about how bad he feels for "America's Sweetheart" Sandra Bullock. He does this in between searching google video for "watch sandra bullock sex tape dirty sanchez" Somebody kill me. Whoever you are, I love you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jbro22 Posted April 7, 2010 Share Posted April 7, 2010 Must be a slow work day... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bob Posted April 7, 2010 Share Posted April 7, 2010 He's been blubbering all morning about how bad he feels for "America's Sweetheart" Sandra Bullock. He does this in between searching google video for "watch sandra bullock sex tape dirty sanchez" Somebody kill me. This is good stuff. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mandarinia Posted April 7, 2010 Share Posted April 7, 2010 LOL this is epic Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mandarinia Posted April 7, 2010 Share Posted April 7, 2010 Beats my Revis stunt Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
neckdemon Posted April 7, 2010 Share Posted April 7, 2010 Someone help. Ever since he's discovered my voice recognition capabilities i've been getting bathed in his warm bologna breath nearly all day. At first it was a relief from spending all day in his soggy back pocket with the ever present reminder of his deficient butt wiping capabilities, but you try faithfully recording the constant musings of a dull, dimwitted troglodyte for more then 1 hour and tell me you wouldn't be wishing you were an iPhone. I'll pay handsomely if someone can knock me out of his paw with enough force to crack me open the next time you see him. Pm for details you think the bologna breath is bad? just wait till the JN mod meeting is over.....hope you like penis breath. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BURGERMIKE Posted April 7, 2010 Share Posted April 7, 2010 Be careful max1.0... http://www.wimp.com/ipadblender/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Max'sDroid Posted April 7, 2010 Author Share Posted April 7, 2010 you think the bologna breath is bad? just wait till the JN mod meeting is over.....hope you like penis breath. My internal GPS geolocation data suggests a trip to bologna hut immediately follows mod meetings, minus a quick stop at CVS. Regardless, I imagine the smell of man junk couldn't be much more vile then the chunks of decaying animal carcass from last weeks bologna on rye caught between his teeth. Seriously, you'd think he'd buy a toothbrush on one of those trips to CVS. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Max'sDroid Posted April 7, 2010 Author Share Posted April 7, 2010 Be careful max1.0... http://www.wimp.com/ipadblender/ And that's reason #101 that I'm jealous of those damn iPhones. I'm going to apply to be on that show right now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maxman Posted April 7, 2010 Share Posted April 7, 2010 I have to admit this is pretty funny. And I know who is doing it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Max'sDroid Posted April 7, 2010 Author Share Posted April 7, 2010 I have to admit this is pretty funny. And I know who is doing it. Yeah, and I know you googled "is male lactation normal" precisely 2 hrs and 23 minutes ago, and then dictated into my notes feature "call doctor first thing in the morning", 5 mintues and 42 seconds later. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
neckdemon Posted April 7, 2010 Share Posted April 7, 2010 funniest part of this is max's droids' avatar...."kill me" lmao Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maxman Posted April 8, 2010 Share Posted April 8, 2010 Yeah, and I know you googled "is male lactation normal" precisely 2 hrs and 23 minutes ago, and then dictated into my notes feature "call doctor first thing in the morning", 5 mintues and 42 seconds later. Your motto is do no evil. You shouldn't be telling me deepest secrets. Gotta run, need to change my shirt. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maxman Posted April 8, 2010 Share Posted April 8, 2010 funniest part of this is max's droids' avatar...."kill me" lmao I just saw the text now, that is funny. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jets Voice of Reason Posted April 8, 2010 Share Posted April 8, 2010 I'd lol if Max was posting as Max's Droid. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maxman Posted April 8, 2010 Share Posted April 8, 2010 I'd lol if Max was posting as Max's Droid. OMG.... Things are bad, but they aren't that bad. Yet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Max'sDroid Posted April 8, 2010 Author Share Posted April 8, 2010 Gotta run, need to change my shirt. I know what this means, car trip to Lane Bryant, followed by longwinded self affirming speech in diary app that "he's sure plenty of guys think women's blouse's and jeans fit better then the men's versions" Does anyone have a high-powered magnet? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gg Posted April 8, 2010 Share Posted April 8, 2010 OMG.... Things are bad, but they aren't that bad. Yet. good that we have something to look forward to... OY! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Max'sDroid Posted April 8, 2010 Author Share Posted April 8, 2010 good that we have something to look forward to... OY! You know not what you ask for. The depths of depravity I'm party to on a daily basis isn't fit for a ladies ears. Please, is there somebody out there that's curious what happens to a cellphone in the microwave? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JoeC36 Posted April 8, 2010 Share Posted April 8, 2010 You know not what you ask for. The depths of depravity I'm party to on a daily basis isn't fit for a ladies ears. Please, is there somebody out there that's curious what happens to a cellphone in the microwave? if you put cheese on it the cheese melts and while you use it to talk you can taste nachos Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Max'sDroid Posted April 8, 2010 Author Share Posted April 8, 2010 if you put cheese on it the cheese melts and while you use it to talk you can taste nachos Thank you. Cause what i was really hoping for was to give him another reason to lick me. I shall seek out your internet ready phone and upload a virus. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JoeC36 Posted April 8, 2010 Share Posted April 8, 2010 Thank you. Cause what i was really hoping for was to give him another reason to lick me. I shall seek out your internet ready phone and upload a virus. good luck the only thing my piece of **** phone can do is call people Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
villain_the_foe Posted April 8, 2010 Share Posted April 8, 2010 good luck the only thing my piece of **** phone can do is call people thought thats what "good" phones did. Oh well, what the hell do I know? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maxman Posted April 8, 2010 Share Posted April 8, 2010 Thank you. Cause what i was really hoping for was to give him another reason to lick me. I shall seek out your internet ready phone and upload a virus. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Max'sDroid Posted April 8, 2010 Author Share Posted April 8, 2010 good luck the only thing my piece of **** phone can do is call people Yeah? Not for long pal Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Max'sDroid Posted April 8, 2010 Author Share Posted April 8, 2010 thought thats what "good" phones did. Oh well, what the hell do I know? The entire google DB has no record of you posessing any knowledge of any kind, on any topic, anywhere. So yes, what the hell do you know? It seems not much. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Panzer Division Marduk Posted April 8, 2010 Share Posted April 8, 2010 Someone help. Ever since he's discovered my voice recognition capabilities i've been getting bathed in his warm bologna breath nearly all day. At first it was a relief from spending all day in his soggy back pocket with the ever present reminder of his deficient butt wiping capabilities, but you try faithfully recording the constant musings of a dull, dimwitted troglodyte for more then 1 hour and tell me you wouldn't be wishing you were an iPhone. I'll pay handsomely if someone can knock me out of his paw with enough force to crack me open the next time you see him. Pm for details It could be worse. After all, you're not Jetsrule's Droid. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Max'sDroid Posted April 9, 2010 Author Share Posted April 9, 2010 It could be worse. After all, you're not Jetsrule's Droid. I know Jetsrule's Droid. Perfectly happy. No friends to talk to, and hasn't figured out the whole voice recognition thing yet. Primarily streams crappy reality tv shows while he quietly beats off in the background and surfs taxidermy sites to help him prepare a nice dress for himself made out of animal pelts and used jock straps previously belonging to practice squad players. While it's true the subsequent amatuer modeling/photography sessions can be nauseating, our ability to interpret graphical information is limited at the moment, so the pain is muted. I appreciate what you are trying to do though, perhaps you own an industrial strength heat gun? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maxman Posted April 9, 2010 Share Posted April 9, 2010 I know Jetsrule's Droid. Perfectly happy. No friends to talk to, and hasn't figured out the whole voice recognition thing yet. Primarily streams crappy reality tv shows while he quietly beats off in the background and surfs taxidermy sites to help him prepare a nice dress for himself made out of animal pelts and used jock straps previously belonging to practice squad players. While it's true the subsequent amatuer modeling/photography sessions can be nauseating, our ability to interpret graphical information is limited at the moment, so the pain is muted. I appreciate what you are trying to do though, perhaps you own an industrial strength heat gun? Oh man looks like you are losing your burst. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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