Barstool: ESPN Retiring Buttfumble (MERGED)

[Lizard King]

http://nyc.barstoolsports.com/random-thoughts/espn-officially-retiring-the-buttfumble-on-sportscenters-worst-of-the-worst/

 

 

Welp, this is it. The end of an era. After like 40+ weeks, SportsCenter is finally putting an end to the reign of the ButtFumble. Brandon Moore is already retired, time to take Sanchez out back and Old Yeller him. To be honest, I think its even more embarrassing. I think they should let nature run its course. Its pathetic to see the Jets as the face of ineptitude week in and week out but its even more embarrassing to know that we needed some sort of special intervention to get us out of there. I want to see the ButtFumble. It fuels my hate fire. I want the franchise to be embarrassed. I want them to recognize how low this franchise has stooped. Like a constant reminder of how exactly not to run your franchise.

Next week, there may be a new “Winner” of Worst of the Worst, but in our hearts, everyone will always know that the true most embarrassing moment in sports is still the ButtFumble. Whether Sports Nation says so or not.

[JiFtheOracle]

[Kleckineau]

Mylie Cyrus is a buttless skank with a freak tongue. Even the not too fussy Snachez wouldn't Buttfumble that.

[Integrity28]

The be-all, end-all on the Miley Cyrus outrage is this: If she was doing exactly the same stuff and looked even remotely attractive, hot or sexual while doing it - there would be NO outrage.

 

She looked so awful doing whatever the **** she was doing, that it discombobulated everyone's "sex-is-fun-o-meter" so badly the only agreeable recourse is outrage.

[Patriot Killa]

Did I really just see this on TV..... There goes ESPN... Always have to have the last laugh.

SportsCenter is prepared for an historic retirement today.

Jeremy Schaap has penned an essay. John Brenkus’ ESPN Sport Science lab in Burbank, Calif. hatched a scientific analysis.

Here are some plays that challenged, but couldn’t beat, the “Butt Fumble”

· Belgian player Pierre-Yves Winkin misses four straight layups on his own basket

· NFL receiver Danny Amendola spikes ball, hits usher

· Boston Mayor Thomas Menino mangles names of Patriots players

· Condor flies away during National Anthem at hockey game

· Michael Bourn knocks Miguel Cabrera’s ball over wall for HR

· Cheese-rolling in England

· Jimmy Rollins misplays popup off his head

· Singer Carly Rae Jepsen’s first pitch

· Soccer’s Maurides sprains his knee while celebrating

· Bruins Milan Lucic and Jaromir Jagr collide in Stanley Cup Finals

Comments from NFL Hall-of-Famers have been gathered. A list of challengers who failed to defeat the honoree has been compiled (see sidebar). So, after being the butt of jokes and undefeated for 40 straight weeks, the current SportsCenter “Not Top 10: Worst of the Worst” play is being jettisoned. The “Butt Fumble” — the longest-running “Not Top 10″ and “Top 10″ play in SportsCenter history — will be no Moore.

And because of it, on Sunday in East Rutherford, N.J., New York Jets quarterback Mark Sanchez will likely be the happiest backup in the NFL.

There will be comfort for Sanchez in knowing that the “Butt Fumble” – the Nov. 22, 2012 play in which he stumbled into the backside of offensive lineman Brandon Moore, fumbled, and saw the New England Patriots’ Steve Gregory return it for a touchdown – has been moved to the “Not Top 10″ rafters.

“We are retiring it this week due to the start of a new NFL season, and the feeling that it was time to start fresh,” said Senior Coordinating Producer Mark Summer. “The ‘Butt Fumble’ has won the ‘Not Top 10′ each week since last Thanksgiving, and we’re not sure anything could top it.”

At least one SportsCenter anchor is fully behind the derriere denouement.

“I won’t miss the ‘Butt Fumble’, but looking back, I will still marvel at its longevity and popularity,” said Kevin Negandhi, who will anchor the retirement party with Sara Walsh. “It really was an unstoppable force, but it’s time, especially when one of the players (Moore) involved has already retired. Time to get some new material and years from now, when we see a really bad play, we’ll say, ‘But can it compare to the Butt Fumble?’ THAT is setting a legacy.”