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Official Countdown 'till Barton assasinates Chads right shoulder' Thread


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A couple of weeks ago I told everyone here on the board about my plan to fly several havoc heli toy helicopters into Chad's right shoulder <tearing his rotator cuff> come training camp, only to realize that I did not have enough money to get to Hofstra this summer. I then told everyone I turned my attention to rockets assuming I could launch one from here in SWFL all the way to Long Island.......well, bad news. I cannot.

I figured this out when I tried launching a rocket from my roof, and it only went about 30 feet down the street (about the maximum distance of Chad's deep throws), but still several hundreds of miles short of Long Island. I had to abort operation [Arm Rocket Chad], and go back to the helicopter plans.

In realizing that my plans to ruin Chad's right shoulder were quickly falling apart, I got a paper route to earn enough money for a 1 way plain ticket to NY in July for training camp. Each morning I have gotten on my scooter and delivered the papers all across town, and I am happy to inform all of you that I have earned well over 1,000 dollars in the past few weeks to afford the trip to Hofstra, as well as the extra supplies needed for my helicopter operation I call [Chopper Chad].

Now, on to the present. In recent days, I have persuaded my little brother Jason (I call him Kellen), also a huge Jets and Pennington fan, to switch to the dark side and help me destroy Chad's right shoulder. He was reluctant at first, but I told him I'd plant a large amount of weed in his dresser, so he decided helping me in operation [Chopper Chad], was a good way to not get his a## kicked by my dad.

In the coming days and weeks, I will share with you updated information <in detail> of operation [Chopper Chad].

Stay tuned!


Barton & Jason

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