THE ILK Posted April 16, 2012 Share Posted April 16, 2012 You smell like cake. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bergen Jet Posted April 16, 2012 Share Posted April 16, 2012 Truth is I do have a tremendous amount of natural swagger combined with a humble exterior that only life can beat into you. But that's why people in general find me comfortable to be around and the fact I do make a nice ban bag chair.Yet when it comes to woman finding me attractive, it's different sorta mystical in a sense. Intangibles? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Crusher Posted April 16, 2012 Author Share Posted April 16, 2012 Intangibles? Im not a mid level desirable fella. Im talking 1 every ten years kinda thing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cindy Posted April 16, 2012 Share Posted April 16, 2012 you're reading them wrong? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Crusher Posted April 16, 2012 Author Share Posted April 16, 2012 you're reading them wrong? Great call. Would be the most obvious answer but unfortunately not the case. My wife runs a hair salon and all the woman that go their always tell her how much they enjoy me and if Im stopping bye. My daughters doing her masters degree and even her girlfriends look forward to coming to my house and enjoying my company. Sometimes I have to go upstairs and make believe I have to poo just to get them to go out and find younger, handsome available boys. I wish that was it. Thanx for trying. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JustInFudge Posted April 16, 2012 Share Posted April 16, 2012 I'm fat, I'm bald, I suck at trimming my goatee, I dress like I'm perpetually on my way to WalMart and I walk with a limp. Yet 80% of the woman I meet make it very obvious to me they want me. Baffling. Weird. You are fat and bald and hotties love you. I'm young, ripped and have a full set of hair and fatties love me. But the answer to this inquiry is very simple - you are Dr. Crushlove. Women cant resist a man who knows how to treat a lady. You know how to make them feel sexy by being a sexy mofo in your own imperfect skin. They can smell your confidence on the never ending layer of sweat that every fat man has on his body daily. You have lyrics for days. You're like Notorious BIG. Bust free styles filled with love content and the ladies cant stand it. They want to rip your clothes off and make waves in your jiggle. They know you've mentored many love starved geeks on the interwebz and they appreciate your philanthropic ways. Also, you're the world greatest dad who has multiple independent business ventures. So they see a successful, stud dad and get all giddy. Especially if they had any daddy issues growing up, forget about it. The question isnt, why do hotties love you? The question is, how did Mrs. Crusher become so lucky to have you all to herself when you're constantly fighting off hoards of young hot women? I bow before you Dr. CL. I bow before you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JustInFudge Posted April 16, 2012 Share Posted April 16, 2012 "Jealousy is a wasted emotion." JiF taught me that. A lesson worth learning. I'm humbled by the fact that I could teach a man of your stature anything at all. <3 u 4eva Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
THE ILK Posted April 16, 2012 Share Posted April 16, 2012 you're reading them wrong? I'm pretty sure he knows JiF is a guy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Crusher Posted April 16, 2012 Author Share Posted April 16, 2012 Weird. You are fat and bald and hotties love you. I'm young, ripped and have a full set of hair and fatties love me. But the answer to this inquiry is very simple - you are Dr. Crushlove. Women cant resist a man who knows how to treat a lady. You know how to make them feel sexy by being a sexy mofo in your own imperfect skin. They can smell your confidence on the never ending layer of sweat that every fat man has on his body daily. You have lyrics for days. You're like Notorious BIG. Bust free styles filled with love content and the ladies cant stand it. They want to rip your clothes off and make waves in your jiggle. They know you've mentored many love starved geeks on the interwebz and they appreciate your philanthropic ways. Also, you're the world greatest dad who has multiple independent business ventures. So they see a successful, stud dad and get all giddy. Especially if they had any daddy issues growing up, forget about it. The question isnt, why do hotties love you? The question is, how did Mrs. Crusher become so lucky to have your all to herself when you're constantly fighting off hoards of young hot women? I bow before you Dr. CL. I bow before you. All great points. But your a little bit of a Dr Crushlove Homer. You gots the bacon colored glasses. Actually most woman only like a man that treat her like a lady until he makes her feel good about herself eventually her own inadequacies causes her to discount him then she treats him like crap for caring about her and has sex with someone like you and ends the relationship. I've been at this sh*t for 34 years and still no sign of it stopping or weakening. If I had to guess the older, fatter and uglier i get the stronger my attraction gets. Weird. Woman do tell me they feel "Pretty" and "Listened too". when Im around them. Not sexy though, I only do sexy with Mrs Crusher. "My IMPERFECT SKIN?" That's like calling the titanic's last voyage delayed. LOL Being a fat disgusting hyper sweating lard a$$ does make for a stinky smelly body. Never been complimented by a lady for my body odor. Truth is Im actually amazing fresh and well kept for a titanic tub-o-lard. I wear Armani Acqua di Gio because it;s light citrus smell accentuates my raw masculinity. In other words "fat dudes need cologne" Woman especially Mrs Crusher compliment me on my male presentation. I think it's easier for me because they just expect me to smell like chito's and feet and when I dont their impressed. Sorta like when a fat kid can break dance at a high level. no on ever sees that coming. My freestyle lyrics and ability to spit truth and spread joy to people is a big part. I always break verbal knowledge on time for people to enjoy. I make little songs for Mrs Crusher all the time. I like to rhyme the worlds delicious and nutritious. not sure any woman has ever wanted to rip my clothes off. I think most worry more about them spontaneously exploding off my body if I have to bend over or reach for something. I know Mrs Crusher would never rip anything of me cause she spends enough time finding stuff to fit me. Spontaneous love making is not fat man fair. If your over 250 pounds you gotta make sure your bathing and caring for yo0ur performance parts before getting too close to a woman. If not refer to the chitos and feet reference from above. I have mentored hundred of young lad's over the years and the woman they have woo'd have actually written me thank you letters. Might be a big part of it. I have had woman tell their men, "you need to talk to him seriously" Good point Gunior that one helps. The Dad thing is a very big part. All the single mommy's my kids hang out with always love it when I show up. They try cooking for me some times but I never eat it because that would be cheating on Mrs Crusher. Never would I do that. My gullet belongs to her. Mrs Crusher isn't lucky, just perfect. Im the lucky one. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Crusher Posted April 16, 2012 Author Share Posted April 16, 2012 I'm pretty sure he knows JiF is a guy. Good point. I do seem to member you got a hot girlfriend pretty close to the time you and I spent time here together. No need to thank me. Im glad to help. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
THE ILK Posted April 16, 2012 Share Posted April 16, 2012 Good point. I do seem to member you got a hot girlfriend pretty close to the time you and I spent time here together. No need to thank me. Im glad to help. She's long gone, thanks! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Christine Posted April 16, 2012 Share Posted April 16, 2012 Hey Cindy! Come back to DM! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Crusher Posted April 16, 2012 Author Share Posted April 16, 2012 She's long gone, thanks! Your welcome. Read my blog. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Crusher Posted April 16, 2012 Author Share Posted April 16, 2012 Hey Cindy! Come back to DM! Hey Christine stay here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
THE ILK Posted April 16, 2012 Share Posted April 16, 2012 Your welcome. Read my blog. No Blog Entries. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Crusher Posted April 16, 2012 Author Share Posted April 16, 2012 No Blog Entries. Im not done yet. These things take time. I will make sure you get it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Christine Posted April 16, 2012 Share Posted April 16, 2012 Hey Christine stay here. We'll have to see if you can keep me amused enough. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Crusher Posted April 16, 2012 Author Share Posted April 16, 2012 We'll have to see if you can keep me amused enough. Entertaining PYT's is one of my special gifts. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JustInFudge Posted April 16, 2012 Share Posted April 16, 2012 All great points. But your a little bit of a Dr Crushlove Homer. You gots the bacon colored glasses. Actually most woman only like a man that treat her like a lady until he makes her feel good about herself eventually her own inadequacies causes her to discount him then she treats him like crap for caring about her and has sex with someone like you and ends the relationship. I've been at this sh*t for 34 years and still no sign of it stopping or weakening. If I had to guess the older, fatter and uglier i get the stronger my attraction gets. Weird. Woman do tell me they feel "Pretty" and "Listened too". when Im around them. Not sexy though, I only do sexy with Mrs Crusher. "My IMPERFECT SKIN?" That's like calling the titanic's last voyage delayed. LOL Being a fat disgusting hyper sweating lard a$$ does make for a stinky smelly body. Never been complimented by a lady for my body odor. Truth is Im actually amazing fresh and well kept for a titanic tub-o-lard. I wear Armani Acqua di Gio because it;s light citrus smell accentuates my raw masculinity. In other words "fat dudes need cologne" Woman especially Mrs Crusher compliment me on my male presentation. I think it's easier for me because they just expect me to smell like chito's and feet and when I dont their impressed. Sorta like when a fat kid can break dance at a high level. no on ever sees that coming. My freestyle lyrics and ability to spit truth and spread joy to people is a big part. I always break verbal knowledge on time for people to enjoy. I make little songs for Mrs Crusher all the time. I like to rhyme the worlds delicious and nutritious. not sure any woman has ever wanted to rip my clothes off. I think most worry more about them spontaneously exploding off my body if I have to bend over or reach for something. I know Mrs Crusher would never rip anything of me cause she spends enough time finding stuff to fit me. Spontaneous love making is not fat man fair. If your over 250 pounds you gotta make sure your bathing and caring for yo0ur performance parts before getting too close to a woman. If not refer to the chitos and feet reference from above. I have mentored hundred of young lad's over the years and the woman they have woo'd have actually written me thank you letters. Might be a big part of it. I have had woman tell their men, "you need to talk to him seriously" Good point Gunior that one helps. The Dad thing is a very big part. All the single mommy's my kids hang out with always love it when I show up. They try cooking for me some times but I never eat it because that would be cheating on Mrs Crusher. Never would I do that. My gullet belongs to her. Mrs Crusher isn't lucky, just perfect. Im the lucky one. This is why you have the PHD and I dont. Did you really even need to ask the question? You're The Crusher, Muffin Top, Dr. Crushlove - its not a miracle that bitches love you. Its science. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Crusher Posted April 16, 2012 Author Share Posted April 16, 2012 This is why you have the PHD and I dont. Did you really even need to ask the question? You're The Crusher, Muffin Top, Dr. Crushlove - its not a miracle that bitches love you. Its science. Cute Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JustInFudge Posted April 16, 2012 Share Posted April 16, 2012 We'll have to see if you can keep me amused enough. You havent even got a taste of the boopsie/muffin top combo yet. Put on your seat belt and prepare yourself for the ride of your life. Welcome. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Christine Posted April 16, 2012 Share Posted April 16, 2012 You havent even got a taste of the boopsie/muffin top combo yet. Put on your seat belt and prepare yourself for the ride of your life. Welcome. We'll see... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
THE ILK Posted April 16, 2012 Share Posted April 16, 2012 Im not done yet. These things take time. I will make sure you get it. Hurry! Cro just had #10 with #8! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JustInFudge Posted April 16, 2012 Share Posted April 16, 2012 We'll see... You're playing mafia, right? If so, then you will most certainly see. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cindy Posted April 16, 2012 Share Posted April 16, 2012 I do not return to mordor. but back on topic... id guess either your professed self esteem issues (I say professed bc youre clearly at least ambivalent about the self loathing, or let's just say deprecation) draw women in... not simply to attempt to chirk you up (no, that's not dirty), but in a comradely fashion. an empathy thing. or... it's the bacon. whenever my dogs ran free as dogs will do, a pocketful of bacon called them home like no bitch in heat ever could. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Klecko73isGod Posted April 16, 2012 Share Posted April 16, 2012 It's clearly your pure animal magnetism, Sally. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Crusher Posted April 16, 2012 Author Share Posted April 16, 2012 I do not return to mordor. but back on topic... id guess either your professed self esteem issues (I say professed bc youre clearly at least ambivalent about the self loathing, or let's just say deprecation) draw women in... not simply to attempt to chirk you up (no, that's not dirty), but in a comradely fashion. an empathy thing. or... it's the bacon. whenever my dogs ran free as dogs will do, a pocketful of bacon called them home like no bitch in heat ever could. Gee all that typing and all you give me is bacon > sex? I feel farther away then ever. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Crusher Posted April 16, 2012 Author Share Posted April 16, 2012 It's clearly your pure animal magnetism, Sally. I don;t really have that. Ive seen that. Not me at all. If I was an animal I would be a three toed sloth. That what makes my attraction to woman so mysterious. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cindy Posted April 16, 2012 Share Posted April 16, 2012 Gee all that typing and all you give me is bacon > sex? I feel farther away then ever. ok, now I get it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Crusher Posted April 16, 2012 Author Share Posted April 16, 2012 ok, now I get it. You always had it baby. you born with it and still have it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GATA Posted April 17, 2012 Share Posted April 17, 2012 It's because you're like so awesome.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Crusher Posted April 17, 2012 Author Share Posted April 17, 2012 It's because you're like so awesome.. That's a very sweet thing to say. But avlot of people are was more awesomer than me. Yet, put us in a crowded room of woman and after an hour or so all the hotties come talk to teh Crusher. Weird. Most conversation start with, "You have some onion dip on your lip tubby" Then bam!! They just start talking me up and telling me how awesome I is. Then tell me how they wish they could find a man like me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JustInFudge Posted April 17, 2012 Share Posted April 17, 2012 It's because you're like so awesome.. I think you're awesome. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GATA Posted April 17, 2012 Share Posted April 17, 2012 That's a very sweet thing to say. But avlot of people are was more awesomer than me. Yet, put us in a crowded room of woman and after an hour or so all the hotties come talk to teh Crusher. Weird. Most conversation start with, "You have some onion dip on your lip tubby" Then bam!! They just start talking me up and telling me how awesome I is. Then tell me how they wish they could find a man like me. Every girl looks for the guy w/ the dip on their lip ... It's like an invitation to our pick up lines. I think you're awesome. I don't like Tebow... -shattered dreams- Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Crusher Posted April 17, 2012 Author Share Posted April 17, 2012 Every girl looks for the guy w/ the dip on their lip ... It's like an invitation to our pick up lines. I don't like Tebow... -shattered dreams- It's not always onion dip sometimes it's salsa. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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