johnny green balls Posted December 12, 2007 Share Posted December 12, 2007 -leave a note on the printer that looks like it was written by a coworker about how he would be much more productive if only he could shake his meth habit -hide a dead fish in the ceiling tile of your buddy's office -eat a bunch of beets the night before a piss test for work add more Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
124 Posted December 12, 2007 Share Posted December 12, 2007 -When your co-worker goes on break, ducttape the register completely and put shoe cleaner all over the keyboard. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thai Jet Posted December 12, 2007 Share Posted December 12, 2007 We often put vasoline on the telephone receivers then call the people up and listen to them growl. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thai Jet Posted December 12, 2007 Share Posted December 12, 2007 -leave a note on the printer that looks like it was written by a coworker about how he would be much more productive if only he could shake his meth habit -hide a dead fish in the ceiling tile of your buddy's office -eat a bunch of beets the night before a piss test for work add more I had beets one night for supper then did a #2 during the nite at work. NOT FUNNY. I nearly gave myself a heart attack. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BP Posted December 12, 2007 Share Posted December 12, 2007 Back in the old days when you were able to unscrew the covers on the ear piece and the mouth piece of a phone, we used to take the thing out of the mouth piece part and put lock tight on the threads before tightening it closed. the frickin dude would say hello eleventy billion times, and would actually start screaming because the person on the other end couldn't hear him. That was circa 1987 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boozer76 Posted December 12, 2007 Share Posted December 12, 2007 If your coworker leaves their computer unlocked during lunch, go on his computer and send an email to the boss asking to borrow $10. Say times are tight and you need money for diapers, dinner, gasoline, etc... Laugh when the boss comes over trying to force ten bucks onto him with pity. Again, if they leave their comp unlocked: Go into microsoft word spell checker and have it automatically correct the spelling Only have it replace a name (use a coworker's name that tends to be used often in inter office emails) with F$cktard. For example, if a coworker named Alan Jones is a crucial part of a team that is working on a project with the unsuspecting coworker it would look like this; "I would like to update everybody on the status of the quarterly earnings reports that Alan Jones and I are working on. " would automatically be changed to "I would like to update everybody on the status of the quarterly earnings reports that F&CKtard Jones and I are working on. " Do not get caught or you will be fired! The employee who sent it can simply play dumb and swear up and down they did not type that. They won't be disciplined for it. If your coworker calls their significant other and talks all mushy by saying "Hi sweetie poopooo" when their significant other answers the phone: Go to their phone when they leave the desk and change their speed dial to significant other to dial one of the bosses of the same sex as their significant other. Laugh deviously to yourself when coworker calls boss and unwittingly calls him/her "sweetie bumpkins." Get in the office early and put a goldfish in the water jug. Bring a few empty boxes of pizza, preferably with some old crusts in it. Keep one slice on hand for yourself. Send an email to coworkers letting them know that pizza is in the kitchen area. Stand in kitchen with your one delicious slice and watch them pout in disappointment at the empty boxes with crust. Tell them they were too late and just missed the rush. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kidhuman Posted December 12, 2007 Share Posted December 12, 2007 Working in a call ceneter we try to make them laugh in mid sentence with a customer. I have rearranged desks next to each other with the exact set up the person had on theirs. We mess with their computers, tape on the mouse ball, put stupid pics up and lock it so wen they unlock it the see it. It doesnt sound like much, but when it gets some people its funny. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
L.I.MikeBleedsGreen Posted December 12, 2007 Share Posted December 12, 2007 I have put Fake snakes,roaches,spiders..etc. under and on top of my boss's desk and my other co-workers.needless to say they were not laughing,and some of them started to scream to the high heavens . And I just sat at my desk and laughed all day....ahhh I kill me Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
johnny green balls Posted December 12, 2007 Author Share Posted December 12, 2007 Bring a few empty boxes of pizza, preferably with some old crusts in it. Keep one slice on hand for yourself. Send an email to coworkers letting them know that pizza is in the kitchen area. Stand in kitchen with your one delicious slice and watch them pout in disappointment at the empty boxes with crust. Tell them they were too late and just missed the rush. that's mean as hell and I love it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SouthernJet Posted December 12, 2007 Share Posted December 12, 2007 every office has the employee who horribly abuses the time allowed for lunch,, well lets say for example most people go to lunch from 11:30 to 12:30...but this employee always goes for 90 to 120 minutes,, OK, so on day of trick,,you wait till they leave at say 11:15...when they leave you write a note on their desk saying 'Urgent, see me immediately', and sign it with the bosses name, AND put the time on it as 11:20 AM!!.. Then wait in glee, as they stroll in at 1:15 PM and see the note thats timed 11:20 and hear them let out a Ohhh, shiiite!!!! Then let them go to boss and blurt out every excuse in book only to have the boss say 'WTF are you talking about?' By the way, we have used this many times in past,,75% use the same excuse, "I had a flat tire" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RSJ Posted December 12, 2007 Share Posted December 12, 2007 Great topic. Leave the following in your coworkers mailbox: Garbage Lunch menus from local resteraunts (most will fax them daily if you request it in the co workers name) Brocures for classes in things your coworker should already know how to do. Also, If your co worker has an office you can: Hide a walkie talkie somewhere in the walls of his office and tape the other on to the back of the public stall. (If you are good at spakling and painting you can even put it in the wall) Lock his door every night. Put ketchup packets on the floor so when your coworker rolls around on his chair they explode. And finally. If you have a copier in a central location that can e-mail a scanned document. You can scan your coworker coded messages as well as anything else annoying that you can find. Oh, and if your coworker prints out personel things you can try to steal them and leave them on the CFO's copier with his name on it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maxman Posted December 14, 2007 Share Posted December 14, 2007 This thread has motivated me. All week long I have been printing out addiction stuff, betty ford clinic info, things like that. I can hear people mumbling about it trying to figure out who it is. It is just sitting at the printer all week, everyone sees it when they get their own printout. Next week I am going to email my staff and say that I have seen some things on the printer that concern me. If anyone has anything they would like to discuss please see me or call me. I will give them my home and cell #s. Then that afternoon I will close my door and make it look like I am in a meeting. If someone isn't around they will think that is the guilty party. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
johnny green balls Posted December 14, 2007 Author Share Posted December 14, 2007 This thread has motivated me. All week long I have been printing out addiction stuff, betty ford clinic info, things like that. I can hear people mumbling about it trying to figure out who it is. It is just sitting at the printer all week, everyone sees it when they get their own printout. Next week I am going to email my staff and say that I have seen some things on the printer that concern me. If anyone has anything they would like to discuss please see me or call me. I will give them my home and cell #s. Then that afternoon I will close my door and make it look like I am in a meeting. If someone isn't around they will think that is the guilty party. before you do that, give the mark the day off and turn off his computer and office lights. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
afosomf Posted December 14, 2007 Share Posted December 14, 2007 the best prank evahh While i was working in Raleigh, a young buck, the guys i worked with had the all-time best prank This know it all type guy was bragging about his gas mileage on his new car, and he was one of those guys who constantly checked the MPG... the guys in the office decided to have fun with the clown, for 3 weeks at lunchtime one of the guys would put a gallon of gas in his car. The guy was smiling ear to ear when he told the crew, that his MPG went up from 32 to 52.. then they stopped,, the guy then went nuts after next week, the MPG"S went way down, the crew advised him to call the dealership saying there has to be something wrong with his car..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
johnny green balls Posted December 14, 2007 Author Share Posted December 14, 2007 the best prank evahh While i was working in Raleigh, a young buck, the guys i worked with had the all-time best prank This know it all type guy was bragging about his gas mileage on his new car, and he was one of those guys who constantly checked the MPG... the guys in the office decided to have fun with the clown, for 3 weeks at lunchtime one of the guys would put a gallon of gas in his car. The guy was smiling ear to ear when he told the crew, that his MPG went up from 32 to 52.. then they stopped,, the guy then went nuts after next week, the MPG"S went way down, the crew advised him to call the dealership saying there has to be something wrong with his car..... haha that's funny but i like my pranks to cost under $50 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SouthernJet Posted December 14, 2007 Share Posted December 14, 2007 the best prank evahh While i was working in Raleigh, a young buck, the guys i worked with had the all-time best prank This know it all type guy was bragging about his gas mileage on his new car, and he was one of those guys who constantly checked the MPG... the guys in the office decided to have fun with the clown, for 3 weeks at lunchtime one of the guys would put a gallon of gas in his car. The guy was smiling ear to ear when he told the crew, that his MPG went up from 32 to 52.. then they stopped,, the guy then went nuts after next week, the MPG"S went way down, the crew advised him to call the dealership saying there has to be something wrong with his car..... hahaha,,, i know that one,, It was Beamon S,,, i worked with him years later,,he would mention it,,he was part of prank or prankee.. phil D tells that story,,it was his dept.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SouthernJet Posted December 14, 2007 Share Posted December 14, 2007 the best prank evahh While i was working in Raleigh, a young buck, the guys i worked with had the all-time best prank This know it all type guy was bragging about his gas mileage on his new car, and he was one of those guys who constantly checked the MPG... the guys in the office decided to have fun with the clown, for 3 weeks at lunchtime one of the guys would put a gallon of gas in his car. The guy was smiling ear to ear when he told the crew, that his MPG went up from 32 to 52.. then they stopped,, the guy then went nuts after next week, the MPG"S went way down, the crew advised him to call the dealership saying there has to be something wrong with his car..... actually the way I heard it was they added for 3 weeks,,he bragged up a storm,,then for a few weeks they siphoned off a bit and he was down to like 10 MPG.,,, Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
afosomf Posted December 14, 2007 Share Posted December 14, 2007 hahaha,,, i know that one,, It was Beamon S,,, i worked with him years later,,he would mention it,,he was part of prank or prankee yep!!! there were 2 other funny pranks This guy decided he was going to start leaving secret love letters on this gullible guy's desk, after about the 3rd one, it had instructions to meet her in the parking lot at 3pm by the silver camry in 3rd row, the dude goes out there and is waiting and waiting and then he looks up and sees the entire finance team about 125 people staring at him from the office above. the other classic one was as follows back in 1980 the company offered some basic accounting classes free of charge, during working hours and those who passed it gt some college credits.. they brought in a teacher from UNC-chapel hill. this one guy had about a 25 average going into final exam, a friend of mine decided to have fun with him, he typed on a computer card Tom Lewis dept XYZ Accounting 101 Professor John Peters Grade B He then left it on his desk in an official company envelope and then he told the other employees in the class that if asks them if they received their grade.. to answer Yes got it this morning . So the clown picks up the envelope and sees his grade and then jumps up and down and then runs into 3 other people in same class of course asking them if they got their grade... with this confirmation in hand he proceeds to the Controllers office and starts saying I told ya Ralph I would pass that course Got my B!!!! He then runs into an old sage black women who sez Tom you did not get no B, Ed toole gave you that B!!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
johnny green balls Posted December 14, 2007 Author Share Posted December 14, 2007 sj has a good one about the vending machine in the computer room. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
afosomf Posted December 14, 2007 Share Posted December 14, 2007 the same guy would play a joke on the incoming 21 year old co-ops he would call them pretending to be the phone company and tell them they are cleaning out the phone lines and to please put the phone over a trashcan for 2 minutes..... you would be shocked to see the number of idiots holding the phone over the trashcan!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RSJ Posted December 14, 2007 Share Posted December 14, 2007 This thread has motivated me. All week long I have been printing out addiction stuff, betty ford clinic info, things like that. I can hear people mumbling about it trying to figure out who it is. It is just sitting at the printer all week, everyone sees it when they get their own printout. Next week I am going to email my staff and say that I have seen some things on the printer that concern me. If anyone has anything they would like to discuss please see me or call me. I will give them my home and cell #s. Then that afternoon I will close my door and make it look like I am in a meeting. If someone isn't around they will think that is the guilty party. That is funny Max. In order to take this prank to the next level I would pick out one worker and sign him up to get weekly or daily e-mails about staying strong through addiction or something to that effect. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maxman Posted December 14, 2007 Share Posted December 14, 2007 That is funny Max. In order to take this prank to the next level I would pick out one worker and sign him up to get weekly or daily e-mails about staying strong through addiction or something to that effect. LOL. Just found out who they think it is. There is a new employee and they are speculating it is him. Too damn funny. Should make for a great company Christmas party! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
strange_andy Posted December 15, 2007 Share Posted December 15, 2007 1. Piss on the toilet paper roll in all the stalls. 2. Rub my junk, then walk up to a co-worker and lightly slap them in the face saying, "Dick in the face". 3. Rustle up a bunch of loose pubic hair and sprinkle them on chairs and keyboards. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blackout Posted December 15, 2007 Share Posted December 15, 2007 1. Piss on the toilet paper roll in all the stalls. 2. Rub my junk, then walk up to a co-worker and lightly slap them in the face saying, "Dick in the face". 3. Rustle up a bunch of loose pubic hair and sprinkle them on chairs and keyboards. hahahaqhahahahahaha Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kidhuman Posted December 15, 2007 Share Posted December 15, 2007 2. Rub my junk, then walk up to a co-worker and lightly slap them in the face saying, "Dick in the face". : Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SouthernJet Posted December 16, 2007 Share Posted December 16, 2007 sj has a good one about the vending machine in the computer room. 1st was to take a coworkers needed item, like say a pair of his glasses, car keys etc, then find one of those vending machines that have sandwiches, fruit etc with the slide open windows,,expensive usually, like buck or two usually.. well those machines used to work (dont know now) so that when someone bought something and opened window, until a new person used machine that window would still slide open (empty now obviously)..so you go to machine and slide open a empty window and put the glasses in there..then push button to scroll to see other windows,,that locks the window from previous purchase,,always fun to see somesome spend $1.50 to get thier glasses/keys back.. amazing i lasted 34 years at this company pulling crap like this Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JETSFAN5180 Posted December 17, 2007 Share Posted December 17, 2007 Take an pair of pants and shoes and set them up in the stall.Hang the pants down over the shoes and lay the waist area on the toliet.It will look like someone is taking a dump. We did at my old work and co-worker actually called the police thinking someone had died in the stall. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
johnny green balls Posted December 17, 2007 Author Share Posted December 17, 2007 -schedule the bloodmobile to come to work. send an email to your coworkers: The blood mobile will be here today at 1pm. I encourage everyone who is comfortable to make a donation to help save a life. PS: Barry, please see me for other, safer ways you can help someone in need this Christmas. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DHJF Posted December 17, 2007 Share Posted December 17, 2007 Switch the "M" and "N" keys on their keyboard. They're very easy to pry up with one of those little screwdrivers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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