The Gun Of Bavaria Posted July 25, 2005 Share Posted July 25, 2005 I just got back from my 10 day vacation to Oklahoma with my wife and daughter to visit some old Army friends and most importantly, allow my grandpa to see his great-granddaughter for the first time. Now before you read the rest, know that I had an outstanding time on this trip. It was much needed and very relaxing. I'm glad I went and wish I could have stayed on it. But, I learned some comical things along the way while driving from point A to point B and back. (My route was WB I-94 to WB I-80 to SB I-55 to WB I-44) Indiana Not much to complain about here. Wasn't in it for that long. At least they are smart enough to have I-94 as 3 lanes each way for its entire length. (See Michigan) - Not sure if IN has heard that the Arab Oil Embargo of the 70s is gone and the national 55 mph speed limit has been repealed. Illinois Where do I start? - How in the name of Zeus' Butthole do you allow WB I-80, the MAIN E/W =Interstate in the country to go down to one lane. HOW? Seriously! One lane? ONE? I don't care about what the construction will do 3 years from now. You don't shut a major artery to one lane. You just don't do it. YOU DON'T DO IT - The Kingsley(sp?) Expressway Construction near Chicago - Oh where to start. First of all see above comment reference one lane. Secondly, what is the point of a 9 mile Toll road? Third, when the aforementioned 'toll road' toll booth creates a backup for 2 miles because of people having to go thru it and gather change, is waving the .65 cent toll that bad of an idea? After all, I'm paying 65 cents for TWO LANES and you're only providing ONE you ASSHOLES. Fourth, when you decide to employ the 'express' lanes, 'local' lanes concept in a god damned construction zone, be sure to mark the exits that CAN'T be reached from the express lanes. You know, small exits like INTERSTATE 80!!! But hey, they did have a sign telling me 3 miles into it I can't access I-80 from the express lanes. Fifth, when a toll booth operator has a PREPRINTED slip of paper telling you how to get back to I-80 from the end of that fricken disaster, that says your signage SUCKS. - For the love of god there is nothing but corn south of Joliet. Corn left, corn right. Corn everywhere. - What exactly is in Bloomington-Normal besides a Wendys that smelled like a sewer line exploded? - And for the love of god, grow some balls and up the speed limit from 65 when I'm 50 miles away from civilization. - Oh, and $2.50 for gas is ridiculous. Missouri - The Show Me State - The Show Me State eh? Show me the Corky Thatcher retard that engineered the interstate junctions over the Mississippi. For the love of god don't blink because if you do you'll miss an important turn or ramp to a road you'll realize you missed 10 minutes later. - I've never left one interstate for another one at a right angle before. Interesting - Speaking of showing me, who in the hell made the highway signs in the STL area? Hellen Keller? I've never seen such ambigious and/or completely informationally cramped signage in my life. Driving through STL is a 2 person job, one to drive, and the other to read the ridiculous signs in the 3 seconds you have to make a decision before miss your ramp. - Truckers should not be allowed to leave the far right lane under any circumstances in mountainous terrain. NONE. Passing the 5th wheel uphill doing 54mph because you want to do 55mph and causing 20 cars to get backed up behind you in the process is straight booty. And they SURE as hell shouldn't be allowed in the far left lane of a 3 lane interstate if you're that lucky to be on one. I actually saw a trucker in the far left lane of a 4 lane interstate. Are you kidding me? - Mo is a bad state for the cruise control, period. Oklahoma - Cows, cows and more cows. - I didn't know it was possible for the heat on Earth to exceed that of Hades. - Did I mention it was hot? - 3.2% beer outside of a liquor store? WTF is that all about? Michigan - Last but not least - Apparently our beloved I-94 was just built for the NAFTA trucks to go to and from Canada and us auto drivers should just feel blessed to be able to share the road. Jesus Christ, trucks, trucks and more trucks. All passing each other at 1 mph more then the guy getting passed. Get the F%$& out of my way. - The road condition sucks, period. Easily the worst of all the states traveled. - I-94 was the first interstate built in Michigan, accounts for an insane 60% or something like that percentage of import/export truck traffic to/from Canada and is still 2 lanes? Are you kidding me? Someone call that dyke facial mole having governor of ours and tell her to widen the damn thing. You're telling me they can't get a large federal grant to beef up the PRIMARY import/export route between the US and Canada. Someone on her staff is napping on the job. If Senator/Klansman Byrd can build a freeway to nowhere, Michigan can add one god damned lane in each direction. - Michigan gas prices suck. - Michigan rest areas are embarrasing. Apparently the buildings are self-maintaining? Hire an illegal alien to clean the god damned things. - Michigan drivers are the biggest assholes of the states mentioned, hands down. Doing 15 over the limit is just enough to keep from getting ran over. Passing on the right is actually encouraged apparently. If there's 10 cars in front of you waiting for a slow car to get out of the way, still tailgate. Because tailgating will somehow tell the 9 in front of the victim car to move through osmosis. Turn signals are optional and my favorite: The left lane has apparently been willed to some drivers as their personal lane. Moving back to the right lane is not required for those types. - Are our highways even policed in MI? I saw ZERO troopers on 294 miles of I-94. ZERO. I would have loved for at least ONE to be around when the guy passed me on the right shoulder at 95mph. In conclusion, driving 17 hrs with a 9 month old baby in the car can be a learning experience. I learned Indiana is well, Indiana. That Illinois needs to take lessons on traffic management in construction zones but is scenic and rural south of Joliet. That Missouri hired blind people to manage their traffic signage, but can be scenic at times in the hills. That Oklahoma is ungodly hot and while scenic and very clean, might as well be mid January in the Arctic during the summer because you can't do anything outside. And last but not least, my homestate of Michigan is a sh*thole. The roads are easily the worst in the nation, the drivers easily on par with NYC/Boston drivers for title of greatest assholes and everything is dirty. The sides of the roads, intersections, city streets, you name it, it's dirty, There's garbage no matter where you go. Michigan is a dying state. It's infrastructure is dying, its economy is dying, its roads are dead and it can't attract young post college professionals and couples looking for a place to raide their children. Everyone I had contact with in IL, MO, and OK were truly great, polite and helpful. Everyone in MI acted liked I was wasting their time as they finished their last hour behind the counter at McDonalds. Pathetic. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thor99 Posted July 25, 2005 Share Posted July 25, 2005 Glad you had a good trip. I've driven all over this great country of ours, and the worst drivers, hands down, are here in Florida. I get angry just walking to my car, let alone actually driving the damn thing. If it's not the old folks, is the damn thug wannabe's driving their pimped out Civics like they've just gotten the white flag at Bristol. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Gun Of Bavaria Posted July 25, 2005 Author Share Posted July 25, 2005 Man I forgot all about Florida drivers. Add them to the list. Seriously though, I had a fun time on vacation. I just was thinking of these things on the road and thought they'd be funny to share Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Preston Howley III Posted July 25, 2005 Share Posted July 25, 2005 Guns- I experienced everything you are talking about, only I did it on 18 wheels. Yes, it is a nightmare. Next summer, do Boston. Thor99, Florida traffic is insane, too. Hwy19 and that new highway they built to Tampa from a point North (I forgot the name of the town but it's about 20 to 25 miles south of Starke) the speed limit is 75MPH and everybody does 90 in the slow lane. I think it's called I-70 and it's a toll road. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
124 Posted July 25, 2005 Share Posted July 25, 2005 You havn't seen anything till you've seen Pittsburgh drivers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Gun Of Bavaria Posted July 25, 2005 Author Share Posted July 25, 2005 You havn't seen anything till you've seen Pittsburgh drivers. I've driven in Pittsburgh, not even close. Moses. I don't know how you could do that (Driving) for a job and not kill someone? Specially the idiots who think an 18 wheeler can stop on a dime when they cut them off. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Gun Of Bavaria Posted July 25, 2005 Author Share Posted July 25, 2005 Oh I forgot the most important lesson. Satellite radio rules. I broke down and bought Sirius Satellite radio. Greatest purchase I've made in a while. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rob D Posted July 25, 2005 Share Posted July 25, 2005 If you take that story and add some speed cameras then you would be describing every main road in the UK. Reading it was like a check list of what I experience every time I drive somewhere. The 'personal lane' thing is probably what I hate most, especially when someone decides "I'm doing the speed limit so why should I let anyone else go faster." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Gun Of Bavaria Posted July 25, 2005 Author Share Posted July 25, 2005 If you take that story and add some speed cameras then you would be describing every main road in the UK. Reading it was like a check list of what I experience every time I drive somewhere. The 'personal lane' thing is probably what I hate most, especially when someone decides "I'm doing the speed limit so why should I let anyone else go faster." Excellent post Rob. Glad (I guess) to see the US isn't the only home to people who decide that as long as they're doing the speed limit they can travel in any lane they want. I got a little spoiled when I lived in Germany for those 3 years. The Germans were always very good about moving over as soon as possible although the trucks passing each other at 1 mph faster then the other was old. I guess when you know traffic is coming at you at 100mph+ you have no choice but to get over. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thor99 Posted July 25, 2005 Share Posted July 25, 2005 I got a little spoiled when I lived in Germany for those 3 years. The Germans were always very good about moving over as soon as possible although the trucks passing each other at 1 mph faster then the other was old. I guess when you know traffic is coming at you at 100mph+ you have no choice but to get over. In Germany, it's called Rechtsfahren, and it's the law. The left lane is used only for passing. You can actually get a ticket passing on the right. Damn Germans know what they are doing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Gun Of Bavaria Posted July 25, 2005 Author Share Posted July 25, 2005 In Germany, it's called Rechtsfahren, and it's the law. The left lane is used only for passing. You can actually get a ticket passing on the right. Damn Germans know what they are doing. I loved the law. But as a born and raised Michigan driver, do you KNOW how hard it was to not pass on the right? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thor99 Posted July 25, 2005 Share Posted July 25, 2005 I loved the law. But as a born and raised Michigan driver, do you KNOW how hard it was to not pass on the right? Yup, whenever I go visit my family, I always catch myself and have to be extra careful. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Gun Of Bavaria Posted July 25, 2005 Author Share Posted July 25, 2005 Yup, whenever I go visit my family, I always catch myself and have to be extra careful. where do they live? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bugg Posted July 25, 2005 Share Posted July 25, 2005 Silly question-how prevelant is EZpass or something like it? In Florida they have something else and with a rental car I had the nightmare of actually stoppong at toll booths for the first time in forever. You can drive from Connecticut to Delaware and not stop at a toll booth anywhere, except where cheapskates who won't break down and get EZpass block the designated lanes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thor99 Posted July 25, 2005 Share Posted July 25, 2005 where do they live? Most of my family lives in Wolfsburg, where the main VW plant is. I have others in Dusseldorf and Berlin. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Gun Of Bavaria Posted July 25, 2005 Author Share Posted July 25, 2005 Most of my family lives in Wolfsburg, where the main VW plant is. I have others in Dusseldorf and Berlin. Nice. I was in Bamberg in Schoene Bayern for 3 years. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thor99 Posted July 25, 2005 Share Posted July 25, 2005 Nice. I was in Bamberg in Schoene Bayern for 3 years. Did you become a Bayern Munchen fan? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stormshadow19 Posted July 25, 2005 Share Posted July 25, 2005 Everything he said about Michigan drivers is true. But, at least it wasn't the 401... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Gun Of Bavaria Posted July 26, 2005 Author Share Posted July 26, 2005 Did you become a Bayern Munchen fan? Naturlich. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smizzy Posted July 26, 2005 Share Posted July 26, 2005 **** travel Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brenjetsfan Posted July 26, 2005 Share Posted July 26, 2005 WHAT I LEARNED ON VACATION.... GO ALONE Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gang Green Girl Posted July 26, 2005 Share Posted July 26, 2005 WHAT I LEARNED ON VACATION.... GO ALONE Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.