"You would think that for $1.6 billion … "

[Bugg]

National media agrees-IT'S OFFICIALLY A sh*tBOX-GREAT WORK!

Would bet that as of today-Jets' ad budget> PSL income

We Went There: Cowboys vs. Giants

By Mike Philbrick on September 6, 2012 3:37 PM ET Al Bello/Getty Images

You don't have to like the Giants or the Cowboys to get excited about seeing them open the NFL season. Come on, it's football. I'm sure after Prohibition, even the crappy booze tasted good.

But when it comes to attending live sporting events I keep changing my mind, going back and forth between "Yes, I totally need to be there for the full experience. It's totally worth it" and "What a nightmare. This whole experience is one long ad for the greatness that is HDTV."

On Wednesday I went with the former but ended the night possibly permanently in the latter. Well, at least for NFL games. Actually, NFL games at MetLife Stadium.

And no, it's not because I don't like the Giants; I'm not a Yankees fan, either, but I have nothing but nicey-nice to say about their new stadium. It wasn't because I was scarred by seeing Queen Latifah sing the national anthem while wearing the same bedazzled Giants jersey that Jon Bon Jovi unfortunately chooses to wear in concert. And it wasn't because of the game itself, in which the Giants and Cowboys took turns saying, "No, sir. I insist, you win," "Absolutely not! As a gentleman, it is only right that you should be the one to win" (I'm sorry for that last part; I've been watching Downton Abbey lately).

The main reason(s) I don't want to go back there is for the unfortunate camaraderie I had with Giants and Cowboys fans alike. A camaraderie built from one phrase we kept saying to each other all night:

"You would think that for $1.6 billion … "

• The roads leading to the stadium could be better than the ones that caused the same traffic nightmares for people going to games in the '70s. At this point I'm fairly confident that HDTV manufacturers spend their lobbying money ensuring that roads surrounding all sporting arenas are never maintained or improved, thus making their product more attractive with every car that tries to sneak into your lane after you've been inching along for 45 minutes. Just like I'm fairly confident that Michael Strahan only took the job with Kelly Ripa as an enormous "eff you" to Tiki Barber's failed TV career.

• They could figure out how people could park. Do you have season tickets? Great! You get a pass (along with the esteemed right to pay for a PSL). Actually, you get the right to buy a parking pass for the season, or you can buy one on the <a href=http://www.ticketexc...master.com/nfl" target=_blank">NFL Ticket Exchange — something most people find out after they get to the game. If you don't have a pass, you need to go to "satellite parking," which, according to this always-handy PDF, means you need to leave where the stadium is, get back on the highway, take a different exit, yadda yadda yadda … and "staff will direct you to satellite parking." That sounds great, except that it doesn't happen. What happens is there are a couple signs, but then there aren't — and then you need to hope that you find it by accident. For those of you who paid several hundred collective dollars for your tickets, it's not really an adventure to look forward to. Oh, and that right to park behind some dark warehouse in an office complex will cost you $35.

• Once you do park on the satellite lots, that they could find a better way of getting you to the stadium than an old-school yellow school bus meant for people no taller than 5-foot-2.

• The Giants wouldn't need to steal the pumped-in crowd noise soundtrack from the Nets and their sad days playing in an empty Izod Center next door. On any key play (usually a third down), the scoreboards would feature one of the Giants saying "Get up!" to get the crowd going. That's great, but accompanying this with what was clearly fake crowd noise is pretty embarrassing for the defending Super Bowl champions, not to mention a storied franchise in the no. 1 media market.

• For the non–"Get up!"-and-make-some-noise plays, that the Giants could find another graphic to put on their scoreboard than "Quiet! Offense at work." For this game I would have settled on a camera constantly on Dallas defensive coordinator Rob Ryan. How amped would fans get with a quiz like "What will Rob eat next? (a) Hot dog, ( Chicken fingers, © His playbook, (d) Section 335"?

• The people wearing the "Alcohol Enforcement" shirts would stop people from getting as wasted as they did. I say this not as some nitpicking teetotaler, but as someone who missed getting puked on (yes, actually puked on) by a dude two rows behind us who had a blood alcohol level of what current technology would most likely calculate as infinity. My brother and father-in-law weren't so lucky. If they had to sum up their experience in one word, I think it would be "chunky."

• If someone did in fact puke all over a bunch of fans (to get this point across, let's call them people who paid lots of money for tickets) that you would eventually see someone, anyone who actually works there. We didn't. Mr. Puker stood up for about 15 whole minutes, swaying back and forth, until a friend escorted him out after one puked-on fan got restless, and by that I mean he smacked him in the face. When we finally found someone from what I assume is the SEAL Team Six wing of the Alcohol Enforcement squad they told us, "Oh, I heard about that … yeah, that guy just left." I wish I just made that up.

• Now that they are in their third season in that place, they could figure out a way for people to stop constantly saying, "You would think for $1.6 billion that … "

[THE ILK]

Unions.

[JohnnyHector]

Unions.

Take the number down to an even $1b.... it doesn't change the fact that the gameday experience is, for the majority of fans, the same as or worse than in the previous stadium.

[Jetsfan80]

This article is hilarious and sad at the same time.

[Jetsfan80]

Take the number down to an even $1b.... it doesn't change the fact that the gameday experience is, for the majority of fans, the same as or worse than in the previous stadium.

Johnson & Mara: "F*ck the fans. There.....I said it."

[Larz]

it was even on the fan today, total joke

sad

[THE ILK]

Take the number down to an even $1b.... it doesn't change the fact that the gameday experience is, for the majority of fans, the same as or worse than in the previous stadium.

Yes, but for $1.6b they should have been able to do so much more to change that.

[Integrity28]

As long as the games are played in the Giants home stadium, in New Jersey, and not on Long Island home of the Jets... then the outcome can't be anything but wrong.

[kay_gee]

That puking thing is a ****ing disaster. If I got puked on at a stadium, I'd be screaming until I got something for it. I've never actually seen anyone at a stadium throw up in the stadium though. Parking lot, yes. Bathrooms, yes. But I didn't see it happen in the seats. Except for that thing in Philly, where someone puked on a small child on purpose. **** Philly.

That said, I agree with the parking thing and the roads. I don't know who designed the cluster**** that is the Meadowlands transportation system, but they should probably get at least 30 lashes.

[bitonti]

so to review this chump parked in the satellite lots and is not a Giants fan, and had a bad time at the game. Wah.

[HessStation]

Stupid rich people.

[GREENBEAN]

It will be even better when the super bowl is played there in the snow. It's gonna be epic!!!

[KINGDIRK]

Unions caused that a stadium that should have cost $500M - $1.6B instead.

I hate the new stadium.

[The Gun Of Bavaria]

The NFL game experience is about the pre/post-game tailgate, period. Truth be told, attending a NFL game is not that fun. The constant play stoppages for commercial time outs beyond distracting and destroys any attempt at a fluid observation experience. Stuck in a stand with drunken a$$holes, there's something to be said for spending your money on a top of the line, 70" TV

[Bugg]

The NFL game experience is about the pre/post-game tailgate, period. Truth be told, attending a NFL game is not that fun. The constant play stoppages for commercial time outs beyond distracting and destroys any attempt at a fluid observation experience. Stuck in a stand with drunken a$$holes, there's something to be said for spending your money on a top of the line, 70" TV

The NFL in general nd the Jets and Giants especially do not grasp except for seeing your friends and tailgating they have made it expensive and unpleasant to go to the game. "Security" has NOTHING to dow ith safety and everything to do with seeing nobody brings in their own food and drinks. As the article says, this place could've been built by TV networks and the makers of HDTVs. At a loss how they went from a bad traffic situation to an even worse one. FurtherThe old stadium had those spirals that got people in and out quickly. Nothing faanyc, but effective and nothing more than concrete and rybar, And yet they didn't put those in the new place. Ans instead the stairs and esacalaors empty ino the concourses on each of the upper levels. Each game sees hundreds of people getting into the stadium colliding with hundreds of other people buying concessions. NO STADIUM I have been to is as chaotic. In fact like New Yankee they make a point of dissipating crowds and allowing free crowd flow. it's as if they DESIGNED this place to have dangerous bottlenecks.

[Lil Bit Special]

Ok. We get it. You didnt like it. What did you expect for your ticket price?? Red carpet and having your hand held to your seats? Problem is people (including me) have too high of expectations of the stadium because of the ridiculous price tag to build it. If you're not paying ridiculous PSL's or sitting in club seating- the teams dont care about you. Plain and simple. They dont care if you got puked on. They dont care if concessions suck. They dont suck on the club level! Nobody is puking in the suites!

the die-hards will be there every week, dealing with the traffic, crowds, a$$holes, and annoying fans.

the casual fans will stop going because its no longer fun and not worth it to battle it anymore.

And then the Jets coaches, players and owner will be crying because the fans dont support this team, and radio blowhards will be telling us how much we suck as fans.

I will say this... the Club levels are very nice! And would definitely be buying seats there if I won Powerball or Mega Millions.

[JohnnyHector]

Ok. We get it. You didnt like it. What did you expect for your ticket price?? Red carpet and having your hand held to your seats? Problem is people (including me) have too high of expectations of the stadium because of the ridiculous price tag to build it. If you're not paying ridiculous PSL's or sitting in club seating- the teams dont care about you. Plain and simple. They dont care if you got puked on. They dont care if concessions suck. They dont suck on the club level! Nobody is puking in the suites!

My expectations were reasonable - an improvement over what was there. With that goal in mind, when it comes to the non-club seats, the stadium is a monumental failure to me.

[Lil Bit Special]

My expectations were reasonable - an improvement over what was there. With that goal in mind, when it comes to the non-club seats, the stadium is a monumental failure to me.

I hoped for a huge improvement, but knew it would fall way short of it and wasnt going to be suckered into buying seats anymore. not surprised at all the stadium isnt made for the common man.

I havent sat in the normal's seats. i refuse to pay for tickets to that place. I enjoyed the tix I got from JN last year. Club level was amazing. I loved the tix a friend got from work.... but I feel bad for those who did buy in expecting an improvement.

[cr726]

Unions caused that a stadium that should have cost $500M - $1.6B instead.

I hate the new stadium.

And you know this how? The unions pick the sh1t gray interior? 2 teams for one stadium and you think the unions are the culprits?

[Bugg]

And you know this how? The unions pick the sh1t gray interior? 2 teams for one stadium and you think the unions are the culprits?

NY/NJ is almost certainly the most expensive place to build anything in the US,and union construction costs play a role in that cost.But the whole plan for the layout of the parking lots, the building itself, the concourses inside, the entrances and exits, things all baked in thr cake, are so bad it's beyond a joke. The concourses are ridiculoulsy overcrowded and the entrances push crowds into each other. It's always claustrophobic. In the old stadium I can recall that kind of overcrowding only twice and only briefly-the end of GinsNRoses/Metallica and the end of AC/DC. And in both cases once the crowds filtered toward the spirals everything was fine. This place doesn't have that; it stays crowded because there are so few exits. You cannot blame that on unions, that's a design flaw. And it's that way because so much of the interior space is devoted to high end crap and so littel to the average fan(paying close to $120 and a PSL). F___ you, Woody!

[cr726]

I agree about being more expensive, but 3x's more? The stadium is a cold prison.

NY/NJ is almost certainly the most expensive place to build anything in the US,and union construction costs play a role in that cost.But the whole plan for the layout of the parking lots, the building itself, the concourses inside, the entrances and exits, things all baked in thr cake, are so bad it's beyond a joke. The concourses are ridiculoulsy overcrowded and the entrances push crowds into each other. It's always claustrophobic. In the old stadium I can recall that kind of overcrowding only twice and only briefly-the end of GinsNRoses/Metallica and the end of AC/DC. And in both cases once the crowds filtered toward the spirals everything was fine. This place doesn't have that; it stays crowded because there are so few exits. You cannot blame that on unions, that's a design flaw. And it's that way because so much of the interior space is devoted to high end crap and so littel to the average fan(paying close to $120 and a PSL). F___ you, Woody!

[ThisYearsModel]

My problem with the NFL is not the cost of going............although that limits me to going one a year or not at all anymore. The problem I have is that the game is nearly unwatchable with all the commercials and the video boards, blasting commercials and such. I spent some coin on a very large HDTV and have the NFL package. It is much more enjoyable to watch from home, where there are no bathroom lines, no $10 beers and no idiotic parking and traffic. The only drunk a-holes are family members and friends, and nobody has ever been barfed on. The first time I took my kid to a game (he was 11), the two things he remembered were the J-E-T-S chant and the word "time out." This on a day when the Jets won 38-10. The draw of seaosn tickets used to be the cost (low) and the fellowhip with friends and fans. Both of those are now gone. The NFL changed the clock rules to speed up the game, then added the same amount of time in extra commercial breaks. They could stage these games in empty stadiums and still make money, and they act like they can. If we suck this year, prepare for the attack on the sucky Jets fans for the 40% no-shows at late season home games. This is a mess that Roger Goodell, and the NFL owners have created.

[KINGDIRK]

And you know this how? The unions pick the sh1t gray interior? 2 teams for one stadium and you think the unions are the culprits?

Unions didnt make it a $hit bag - unions and politicians were the reason it costs nearly $2B to build. My issue is with the price and how it didnt include a retractable roof at that insane cost. That BS about it costing "an extra $1B to put in a retractable roof" is such a load of crap.

Reliant Stadium in HOU cost less than $400M to build a decade ago. Even factoring inflation, thats far cheaper than the monstrosity that is MetLife.

Lucas Oil in INDY - cost $700M just a few years ago and that place $hits on this dump.

Both of these stadiums have retractable roofs - The fact that Metlife, an inferior stadium cost more than twice as much to build is a fukin crime.

[kay_gee]

it doesn't matter what the cost of the stadium is. even if the stadium cost half a billion, you'd still expect better than the sh*tty parking situation and the alcohol police to prevent people from being puked on.