Popular Post MykePM Posted May 21, 2022 Popular Post Share Posted May 21, 2022 The Onion takes another easy shot at us… https://www.theonion.com/embarrassed-man-frantically-clears-search-history-after-1848950799 Add them to the list with SNL, Ted Lasso, Curb Your Enthusiasm, sports media talking heads, and most fans of other NFL teams. Normally I wouldn’t draw attention to crap like this, but there’s a certain novelty to digs like this for me now. I’m optimistic that the laughingstock status will start to disappear as of this season. Let them get their digs in now. ———————————— Embarrassed Man Frantically Clears Search History After Googling Jets’ Playoff Chances Today 8:27AM GALLOWAY, NJ—Cursing himself and sweating as he tried to eliminate all traces of what he’d done, embarrassed local man Chris Burnley was said to be frantically clearing his internet search history Friday after googling the New York Jets’ playoff chances. “Jesus Christ, what the **** is wrong with you? No one can know you look at demented stuff like this,” the visibly sheepish man reportedly told himself as he quickly deleted a number of compromising searches from his history, including “Jets Super Bowl odds,” “can NY Jets win AFC East?” and “Zach Wilson MVP.” “God, what if someone walked in? What if one of my kids was using the computer and found this? I’ve got to get these sick urges out of my system without using the family computer. Goddamn it, I wish my old laptop still worked.” At press time, sources confirmed Burnley was rushing to the mailbox to get his Visa statement before his wife could find out that he’d used the couple’s credit card to bet on the Jets winning the Super Bowl. 10 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bronx Posted May 21, 2022 Share Posted May 21, 2022 What just happened? WTF is this sh*t? 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jet_Engine1 Posted May 21, 2022 Share Posted May 21, 2022 18 minutes ago, MykePM said: The Onion takes another easy shot at us… https://www.theonion.com/embarrassed-man-frantically-clears-search-history-after-1848950799 Add them to the list with SNL, Ted Lasso, Curb Your Enthusiasm, sports media talking heads, and most fans of other NFL teams. Normally I wouldn’t draw attention to crap like this, but there’s a certain novelty to digs like this for me now. I’m optimistic that the laughingstock status will start to disappear as of this season. Let them get their digs in now. ———————————— Embarrassed Man Frantically Clears Search History After Googling Jets’ Playoff Chances Today 8:27AM GALLOWAY, NJ—Cursing himself and sweating as he tried to eliminate all traces of what he’d done, embarrassed local man Chris Burnley was said to be frantically clearing his internet search history Friday after googling the New York Jets’ playoff chances. “Jesus Christ, what the **** is wrong with you? No one can know you look at demented stuff like this,” the visibly sheepish man reportedly told himself as he quickly deleted a number of compromising searches from his history, including “Jets Super Bowl odds,” “can NY Jets win AFC East?” and “Zach Wilson MVP.” “God, what if someone walked in? What if one of my kids was using the computer and found this? I’ve got to get these sick urges out of my system without using the family computer. Goddamn it, I wish my old laptop still worked.” At press time, sources confirmed Burnley was rushing to the mailbox to get his Visa statement before his wife could find out that he’d used the couple’s credit card to bet on the Jets winning the Super Bowl. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Spoot-Face Posted May 21, 2022 Popular Post Share Posted May 21, 2022 Imagine getting upset at an Onion article. 2 2 18 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post kdels62 Posted May 21, 2022 Popular Post Share Posted May 21, 2022 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hal N of Provo Posted May 21, 2022 Share Posted May 21, 2022 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Waka Flocka Flacco Posted May 21, 2022 Share Posted May 21, 2022 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Green Ghost Posted May 21, 2022 Share Posted May 21, 2022 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Icer Posted May 21, 2022 Share Posted May 21, 2022 Low hanging fruit 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
peebag Posted May 21, 2022 Share Posted May 21, 2022 Gosh. I'm so, so very angry. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stark Posted May 21, 2022 Share Posted May 21, 2022 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Jetsfan80 Posted May 21, 2022 Popular Post Share Posted May 21, 2022 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jet Nut Posted May 21, 2022 Share Posted May 21, 2022 1 hour ago, MykePM said: The Onion takes another easy shot at us… https://www.theonion.com/embarrassed-man-frantically-clears-search-history-after-1848950799 Add them to the list with SNL, Ted Lasso, Curb Your Enthusiasm, sports media talking heads, and most fans of other NFL teams. Normally I wouldn’t draw attention to crap like this, but there’s a certain novelty to digs like this for me now. I’m optimistic that the laughingstock status will start to disappear as of this season. Let them get their digs in now. ———————————— Embarrassed Man Frantically Clears Search History After Googling Jets’ Playoff Chances Today 8:27AM GALLOWAY, NJ—Cursing himself and sweating as he tried to eliminate all traces of what he’d done, embarrassed local man Chris Burnley was said to be frantically clearing his internet search history Friday after googling the New York Jets’ playoff chances. “Jesus Christ, what the **** is wrong with you? No one can know you look at demented stuff like this,” the visibly sheepish man reportedly told himself as he quickly deleted a number of compromising searches from his history, including “Jets Super Bowl odds,” “can NY Jets win AFC East?” and “Zach Wilson MVP.” “God, what if someone walked in? What if one of my kids was using the computer and found this? I’ve got to get these sick urges out of my system without using the family computer. Goddamn it, I wish my old laptop still worked.” At press time, sources confirmed Burnley was rushing to the mailbox to get his Visa statement before his wife could find out that he’d used the couple’s credit card to bet on the Jets winning the Super Bowl. Takes a shot at "us" ouch 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
More Cowbell Posted May 21, 2022 Share Posted May 21, 2022 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jet_Engine1 Posted May 21, 2022 Share Posted May 21, 2022 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
southparkcpa Posted May 21, 2022 Share Posted May 21, 2022 10 hours ago, MykePM said: The Onion takes another easy shot at us… https://www.theonion.com/embarrassed-man-frantically-clears-search-history-after-1848950799 Add them to the list with SNL, Ted Lasso, Curb Your Enthusiasm, sports media talking heads, and most fans of other NFL teams. Normally I wouldn’t draw attention to crap like this, but there’s a certain novelty to digs like this for me now. I’m optimistic that the laughingstock status will start to disappear as of this season. Let them get their digs in now. ———————————— Embarrassed Man Frantically Clears Search History After Googling Jets’ Playoff Chances Today 8:27AM GALLOWAY, NJ—Cursing himself and sweating as he tried to eliminate all traces of what he’d done, embarrassed local man Chris Burnley was said to be frantically clearing his internet search history Friday after googling the New York Jets’ playoff chances. “Jesus Christ, what the **** is wrong with you? No one can know you look at demented stuff like this,” the visibly sheepish man reportedly told himself as he quickly deleted a number of compromising searches from his history, including “Jets Super Bowl odds,” “can NY Jets win AFC East?” and “Zach Wilson MVP.” “God, what if someone walked in? What if one of my kids was using the computer and found this? I’ve got to get these sick urges out of my system without using the family computer. Goddamn it, I wish my old laptop still worked.” At press time, sources confirmed Burnley was rushing to the mailbox to get his Visa statement before his wife could find out that he’d used the couple’s credit card to bet on the Jets winning the Super Bowl. We are a laughing stock to the entire country….. we are the new Browns. Woody and his brother have ruined this team, perhaps Douglas can fix it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
the Claw Posted May 21, 2022 Share Posted May 21, 2022 Yes. Also no. Also maybe. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Adoni Beast Posted May 21, 2022 Share Posted May 21, 2022 8 hours ago, More Cowbell said: Classic show. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SAM SAM HE'S OUR MAN Posted May 21, 2022 Share Posted May 21, 2022 10 hours ago, Icer said: Low hanging fruit 1 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jet9 Posted May 21, 2022 Share Posted May 21, 2022 2022 is the stupidest timeline ever. And no, not because of The Onion. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Integrity28 Posted May 21, 2022 Popular Post Share Posted May 21, 2022 Stop trying to censor humor. 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Integrity28 Posted May 21, 2022 Share Posted May 21, 2022 Also, stop being ❄️❄️ 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GreenFish Posted May 21, 2022 Share Posted May 21, 2022 Used to love reading the Onion. For whatever reason I stopped. Not sure of the quality of their work now, but when they first started, they put out some funny stuff. For those that might not be familiar, they are a satirical publication. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FTL Jet Fan Posted May 21, 2022 Share Posted May 21, 2022 Sounds Legitimate Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MykePM Posted May 21, 2022 Author Share Posted May 21, 2022 2 hours ago, Integrity28 said: Stop trying to censor humor. I’m not trying to censor humor, and I’ve read some clever, funny stuff in The Onion. I want them to do better. The cheap, throwaway Jets joke is the laziest form of sports humor. It’s become the lowbrow equivalent of slipping on a banana peel or a pie in the face. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jet2020 Posted May 21, 2022 Share Posted May 21, 2022 1. It’s the Onion… Seriously? 2. We’ve won 6 games in the last 2 years…SERIOUSLY??? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hex Posted May 21, 2022 Share Posted May 21, 2022 https://www.theonion.com/knife-wielding-tesla-kills-pedestrian-1848881478 https://www.theonion.com/kitchenaid-unveils-new-countertop-food-truck-for-orderi-1848739008 https://www.theonion.com/tom-brady-s-announcing-deal-includes-incentives-for-num-1848918088 Ah yes The Onion. The Finest News Source 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
doitny Posted May 21, 2022 Share Posted May 21, 2022 man has to get rid of his Jets google searches so the kids dont see it.... but he leaves the Porn... 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jeremy2020 Posted May 21, 2022 Share Posted May 21, 2022 14 hours ago, MykePM said: The Onion takes another easy shot at us… https://www.theonion.com/embarrassed-man-frantically-clears-search-history-after-1848950799 Add them to the list with SNL, Ted Lasso, Curb Your Enthusiasm, sports media talking heads, and most fans of other NFL teams. Normally I wouldn’t draw attention to crap like this, but there’s a certain novelty to digs like this for me now. I’m optimistic that the laughingstock status will start to disappear as of this season. Let them get their digs in now. ———————————— Embarrassed Man Frantically Clears Search History After Googling Jets’ Playoff Chances Today 8:27AM GALLOWAY, NJ—Cursing himself and sweating as he tried to eliminate all traces of what he’d done, embarrassed local man Chris Burnley was said to be frantically clearing his internet search history Friday after googling the New York Jets’ playoff chances. “Jesus Christ, what the **** is wrong with you? No one can know you look at demented stuff like this,” the visibly sheepish man reportedly told himself as he quickly deleted a number of compromising searches from his history, including “Jets Super Bowl odds,” “can NY Jets win AFC East?” and “Zach Wilson MVP.” “God, what if someone walked in? What if one of my kids was using the computer and found this? I’ve got to get these sick urges out of my system without using the family computer. Goddamn it, I wish my old laptop still worked.” At press time, sources confirmed Burnley was rushing to the mailbox to get his Visa statement before his wife could find out that he’d used the couple’s credit card to bet on the Jets winning the Super Bowl. Have you considered challenging the writer to a duel with pistols to defend your honor? 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
defensedoesntgetyoulaid Posted May 21, 2022 Share Posted May 21, 2022 4 hours ago, southparkcpa said: We are a laughing stock to the entire country….. we are the new Browns. Woody and his brother have ruined this team, perhaps Douglas can fix it. I think the Browns are the new Browns 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Crusher Posted May 21, 2022 Share Posted May 21, 2022 3 hours ago, Integrity28 said: Stop trying to censor humor. Hurry up, call somebody fat or a hippie. That’s still ok. Right? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jetsfan80 Posted May 21, 2022 Share Posted May 21, 2022 2 hours ago, The Crusher said: Hurry up, call somebody fat or a hippie. That’s still ok. Right? But calling @StraightCash @Brett "thunder thighs": NOT okay. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
freestater Posted May 22, 2022 Share Posted May 22, 2022 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jetsfan80 Posted May 22, 2022 Share Posted May 22, 2022 4 minutes ago, freestater said: Scumbag kind of throw 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FloridaJetsFan Posted May 22, 2022 Share Posted May 22, 2022 Hurry up, call somebody fat or a hippie. That’s still ok. Right? Says the fat hippie guy…Sent from my iPhone using JetNation.com mobile app 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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